[pretzel]

Just a note: Already started a thread on dating older men in the "Dating" section but didn't want to pose this question there.

How is sex with older men (10/15+)? Are there particular issues or concerns which arise during intercourse with older lovers/partners? How are older partners different in their views or behaviors related to sexual activity?

We work just fine thank you,

Are we as enthuastic as we were in our youth, you bet. Trust me,

Am I the same lover as I was when I was younger, no I don't think so. Personally, I'm more patient and in tune with my wife's body and what pleases her than I was before. Over the course of the years my view of sex has changed dramatically. Sex is less about intercourse and getting off and more about pleasure and the overall feeling that comes with it. But that's just me.

But we still can have alot of fun.

[Texasred]

Just a note: Already started a thread on dating older men in the "Dating" section but didn't want to pose this question there.

How is sex with older men (10/15+)? Are there particular issues or concerns which arise during intercourse with older lovers/partners? How are older partners different in their views or behaviors related to sexual activity?

Two things: I have been that "older man" in a couple of relationships, one in which I was early 40s, she was early 20s, and we got along just fine. After the initial novelty wore off, we found we were just two people who liked doing the same sorts of things, and pretty soon the age difference just wasn't an issue at all - we forgot about it. She got over worrying about how I'd be around her friends once we'd met them a time or two, and got along perfectly with my friends due to her wit and charm.
But to turn your question upside down: I would recommend to any man that he'd enjoy having a relationship with an older woman! I have dated several, and I always loved their self-assurance, confidence, and assertiveness - especially in the bedroom.
Without a doubt the best lover I ever had was a woman who was at least 15 years older than me, maybe more, when I was in my early 40s; without making me feel like an ignorant klutz, she managed to teach me a great deal about giving and receiving pleasure.

[cocoa]

We work just fine thank you,

Are we as enthuastic as we were in our youth, you bet. Trust me,

Am I the same lover as I was when I was younger, no I don't think so. Personally, I'm more patient and in tune with my wife's body and what pleases her than I was before. Over the course of the years my view of sex has changed dramatically. Sex is less about intercourse and getting off and more about pleasure and the overall feeling that comes with it. But that's just me.

But we still can have alot of fun.

Two things: I have been that "older man" in a couple of relationships, one in which I was early 40s, she was early 20s, and we got along just fine. After the initial novelty wore off, we found we were just two people who liked doing the same sorts of things, and pretty soon the age difference just wasn't an issue at all - we forgot about it. She got over worrying about how I'd be around her friends once we'd met them a time or two, and got along perfectly with my friends due to her wit and charm.

Ok, gentlemen. I stand corrected. Thank you for responding. It was nice to get the older male's perspective.

[cocoa]

I apologize for any assumptions made about this subject. thx to everyone who responded.

[Rae21]

Just a note: Already started a thread on dating older men in the "Dating" section but didn't want to pose this question there.

How is sex with older men (10/15+)? Are there particular issues or concerns which arise during intercourse with older lovers/partners? How are older partners different in their views or behaviors related to sexual activity?

My boyfriend is 25 years my senior and I have never noticed any issues with the intamate part of our relationship; mostly when I think about it I find it's better than any of my past ones with men my age (age in my case brought both experience and virility to the table). I think the thing, that at least in my case, causes this insight is that my present partner tends to be less hurried and more attentive to me than men my own age, who tend to want to take care of thier own needs or wants and then help me with mine instead of working together. That and I find that there is a balance between our emotional connection and our physical one.

[cocoa]

That and I find that there is a balance between our emotional connection and our physical one.

That's nice. This is what i'd hope to find.

[Texasred]

That and I find that there is a balance between our emotional connection and our physical one.

That's what everyone wants to find! Good for you.
- TR

[cocoa]

Not sure what i was hoping to learn when i began this thread. This topic is beyond my comfort level and experience. But it's been interesting reading the responses.

[Texasred]

Be careful what you wish for...

[Allie602]

I disagree that middle aged men are compatible with woman 20 yrs their junior. I have 2 friends who dated men in their 40 and 50s in the past. the women were in their 20s, and as far as anyone could see, it seemed to be for the financial perks. Not nice. One woman was supported by a guy throughout grad school, when she got her degree, she met a guy her age and married leaving the older guy in the dust. He was devastated and felt used. Both woman said the sex was bad the older guys did not have a clue when it came to sex. Neither of them gave oral sex but they wanted non stop bjs. I think they seek out younger woman for bj it seems.

A middle aged man's attitudes towards women are rooted in a time when woman were less free sexually, the middle aged men know less about female sexuality than younger men. One older bf told my friend that he was concerned about the number of partners she had and even used the term "getting used up", like there was a finite amount of sex any v could handle before it fell apart.

I suppose you could find a man 20 yrs older than you to have a relationship with but I can't see why?? It is a buyers market there are at least 20 egger middle-aged men for every one 20 yr old girl. The competition is fierce. It's flattering and the lure of money is tempting but I think it is a well laid trap. You have to step back and look at the man - do you have anything in common with him? If he were poverty stricken tomorrow would you feel the say way? In five years where do you see your self?

I have to admit I have issues with this - I had a bad experience with an older man when I was 15, so in my eyes I see no reason for a middle aged man to seek out a young girl. The naivety is easy for them to exploit, the money is freely spent almost too much, it's a seduction in a with the balance of power in his favor. I can't help feeling a little queasy when middle aged men approach me, you can almost see the wheels turning "I wonder if she is into older men or maybe I can connivence her of the advantages"

They don't seem to seek a relationship in an open and honest way when they begin to sniff around young women. They seem to be looking for an opening and like a salesman they get your attention and then make their pitch, money, experience travel bla bla bla. . Older men have an agenda they are trying to recapture their youth, so the relationship is about them not the young woman. It not the person the woman is but the ego boost he gets out of showing off a youthful woman.

Better to stick with men within your own age bracket, they have agendas that you can figure out and they can see you as a person and care about you as an individual. A young man's mind is not shrouded in impending doom and he does not seek a woman out as a talisman.