[Harmony]

I was just browsing through one of the most recent, 'my penis is x inches long, ladies please advise...' threads and thought I would try and marshall some thoughts and share some information on the subject since it seems to be of such interest to us all and seems to be a very real cause of turmoil to so many men, both young and old.

Any contributions are appreciated, especially from SP346, JNS and Stillness (sorry if I forgot anyone else) who all made very insightful contributions to the other thread I just read through.


HARMONEY'S IS MY PENIS SMALL SELF HELP CHART. START AT NO.1 AND WORK THROUGH ACCORDINGLY.

1) Harmony, I think I have a small penis, I worry about how small it is all of the time - HELP!

OK, call off the life-boats and calm down, most men wouldn't say no to owning a bigger penis. I suppose you've measured it? Go to No.2 below...

SKIP THIS IF YOU WANT TO GO STRAIGHT TO THE FLOW CHART
Before we go any further, lets just get a few things out of the way, please read the following...
a) Most of the men you have seen in porn are at LEAST average (especially in anal scenes) and above. I can also attest that from the perspective of someone who has made some of their own POV porn certain angles are VERY flattering, and create the optical illusion you are much larger than you really are. Standing up and filming a girl performing oral on you is one good example.
b) shaving the hair around the base of the penis and testicles AGAIN,creates the optical illusion that the penis is larger than it really is. I shaved mine in 2003 when I was backpacking and have never let it grown back fully since, it just makes my penis look smaller the longer the hair gets
c) ANYTHING which claims to make your penis larger (except perhaps plastic surgery) is a con and or dangerous. To the best of my knowledge plastic surgery penis enlargement is risky at best and adds only an inch to the erect size.
d) WOMEN: in the recent thread there were a few comments which I must admit (I can't lie) did make me giggle a bit (especially the junior member one) HOWEVER, to put this in perspective the size of a man's penis is something completely out of his control, I suppose it really is a lottery, and there is pretty much (unlike boob jobs or lipo) NOTHING that can be done to change it. Making fun of a man's penis is like making fun of a girls weight or the fact that her vagina is (perceived) to be too big. We all have things about ourselves we didn't ask for and can't change, and for many men this is one of them.
It's probably a good thing penis enlargement isn't as readily available as say boob jobs are, otherwise men, being the egotistical creatures we are, would all be swaggering around with ridiculously large organs.

2) Yes, I have measured it, it's... And this is probably a measurement from the side or bottom, not the top, isn't it?

BEFORE WE PROCEED, SKIP THIS TO JUMP STRAIGHT TO THE JUICY BITS...
I'd rather not hear the measurements, but since we're talking size... Most people provide the length, but girth seems to but just as, if not more important to women. Women though, like men, are all different so we can expect different preferences from each, with some common themes existing throughout.
Apparently Durex produced a size chart which addressed penis girth. I can't remember everything but what I do remember is that it said if you CAN'T (because it's too thick) fit your erect penis into a cardboard toilet roll, it is ABOVE average girth. I can't remember any more but I can only guess that if it fits in then its average or below average girth.
Given the choice, I would imagine most women would choose an average penis of average girth as opposed to a long penis of below average girth or vice versa, though we'll wait for them to provide input.

a) less than three inches

Sounds like one of those micro penises. To the best of my knowledge no man on this site has admitted to having a micro penis. They do exist and
this thread wouldn't be complete without a mention. I'll also share some of the women's reactions I've heard so that any guys who read this will have an example of how the girls reacted and what they thought.

I would also appreciate if any of the learned ladies here who have encountered one would honesty but tactfully share their experiences.
I know three different girls who have told me about micro penises they have encountered.

Firstly, an ex of mine started telling me she once, while getting frisky with a guy, encountered a penis which was a similar length to her little finger and slim, and consequently decided not to have sex with the guy. That's as far as we got but I do remember her using the word "bizarre" and saying, "I just didn't let it happen".

Secondly, a female friend said she really fancied a really good looking guy from work (she categorically said she felt misled since he had the confidence and cocky arrogance of a man with a big penis, and her 'penis-dar' let her down) and started fooling around with him (I can't remember where, I don't think it was a bedroom setting) anyway, she unbuttoned him and started fishing around in his underwear and felt what she thought was a tag from his clothing and ignored it but he said, (I sincerely felt sorry for the guy when I heard this) "no, that's it, sorry there isn't much". I can't remember what else she told me, but I don't think she slept with him or anything else happened. I do know that she was very experienced and that she also protected his identity and wasn't nasty to him. This and the above were only causal encounters and potential relationships were not terminated as a result of the girl discovering a small penis.

Thirdly, another casual encounter. My female friend met a guy on holiday and got into bed with him. She said it was "tiny" and she couldn't feel it. She said the guy actually asked if she could feel him inside her during sex, but I know she wouldn't have said anything unkind to him in response to that question. In this case his size (or lack of) didn't stop her from having sex with the man, but I do remember her saying she did do anal with him because she knew it wouldn't hurt her and usually it did (every cloud...). She has since got married to a man who's penis she describes as "average" and she's always been a size queen.

TO conclude, it seems that an understanding and accepting partner who is open to other forms of satisfaction and stimulation than penetrative sex is what would be required. Blow-jobs will be easy for her ;-) and don't be closed to the idea of stocking up on sex toys for her, oh, and master oral ;-)

b) three to just under five inches

Under 5 inches is what most western women would consider to be on the smaller side, I believe, the closer to three inches the smaller, obviously. This really has been thrashed to death so in short, if you fall into this bracket: make sure you're great at oral and read plenty of sex guide books for men, master foreplay and technique, read the multi orgasmic man and make sure you can last for ages, and work hard in the gym and at work/school. Get a good education, aim to succeed in work and make sure that when you meet the right woman you can offer her a well balanced, grounded man who is financially independent. There's no such thing as an ugly millionaire or a millionaire who's penis is too small. While women enjoy sex as much as men status is as much of a turn on to them as physical attraction is to men.

c) five inches to just under seven

Five inches is the small side of average, and approaching seven inches places you at the larger side of average. I believe the majority of the male population fits into here. Again, the above suggestions apply and make sense irrespective of penis size, but men in this bracket, especially those over six inches shouldn't be worrying about their penis size.
Of all my friends the guy I know who has slept with the most women, and who attracts hot women all the time told me he has a 5" penis and is 5.7" tall. Something to maybe bare in mind.

d) seven inches or over

Stop showing off and wasting my time. It's likely that just as many women will will find it uncomfortable as will love it. Lear the 'entering a woman in 20 breaths technique' I always go on about so you do not cause any discomfort.

Q and A

Harmony, I want to make my penis bigger?

I already said you can't. Apparently being overweight can somewhat reduce size due to fat deposits around the base of the penis, but that's it. By losing weight of you're particularly large you may gain half an inch, max.

Harmony, I think my GF has had bigger, I hate that, what can I do?

A lot, actually...
Being average size or below means she may well have had bigger, and if you've asked her whether she has (which you have, haven't you?) she may well have lied to protect your feelings and try and save herself a headache. The good news is that if her donkey penis-ed ex was so great, she'd still be with him. If you genuinely think that she is partial to size and desires/misses it don't be afraid to introduce larger sex toys into the bedroom, just don't be upset if she loves them, her emotional attachment is to you. If you DO persist in asking her to admit she likes size, and she acquiesces and confesses, you have no right to be angry or upset if you don't like the answer (you pushed for) just embrace it, it's a beautiful thing watching a woman pleasure herself with a vibrator, so who cares if it's bigger than you are?
If you can't give her bigger, then aim to give her BETTER. Given the choice of one over the other I'll bet most women would opt for BETTER every time. Aim to become a better lover and a better man: better yourself physically and academically, this ALL contributes to making you more attractive, and in turn leads to greater confidence.
Aim to master foreplay and oral; if you can't last long enough to satisfy a woman start working on that. What's the point in having a big penis, or any penis if you don't know how to use it? Become a skillful, attentive and generous lover, you wont tick the 'big penis' box with a smaller penis but as one girl pointed out if she can make herself climax with a finger, then a small penis can technically hit everything there is to hit that needs hitting. In short its not the size of the wand but the magic you weave when you wave it.

But all girls love a big penis...

No they don't. This is getting boring now; just search through some of the threads on this site.

Here are some real quotes from women about men they've been intimate with who were big.

"he thought he didn't have to do any of the work because he knew he had a big penis"
"men with average penises are better in bed because they work harder"
"his penis just hurt"
"big is alright [for novelty value] but my current [long term] partner is average and every thing's just fine"
"I don't care how big his penis is, it's the man attached to it"
"sex became boring we could only do a couple of positions or it hurt too much"
"I've had a big penis before, but the best sex is always with average men" I've heard this from multiple women.

But all the men in porn are big, that must be what women want, surely?

Most men in porn are big, and most women in porn are very, very petite so it makes the men look even bigger. 90% of women don't even watch porn, and care little or nothing for it. The last time your GF probably looked at porn was when she went through the browsing history on your PC.


If having a big penis was SO important, then hypothetically all of the 'big' men would be dating/married and all of the smaller men would be involuntarily celibate, and we all know that is not the case.

[Harmony]

Addendum

As an afterthought, one thing did cross my mind, the issue of disclosure. This is something I would be very interested to hear from the ladies' perspectives. One common theme which seems to pop up is the element of surprise when a women gets to see a man's penis and it is bigger or smaller than average/than she expected. The bigger or smaller the greater the surprise, it seems. The 'surprise' element of the ladies who discovered the mico-penises seemed to play a big role in their reactions, my guess is that the surprise is what kills the moment for them.

I'm interested to hear at which 'stage' in the build up leading to sex - if any - a woman would like a man to disclose that he is particularly concerned that he won't measure up, or is extra large and sex may be, at best uncomfortable. Obviously admitting to being on the small side will be much more humiliating than smugly expressing any concern you may have that your enormous penis tends to create discomfort, despite that sex with the larger man may actually be a more unpleasant experience.

Is a preparatory 'warning' for women important? Would it better prepare you psychologically, making you more likely to go through with the entire act?

[Rhonda14]

I read this on a whim but found it to be very informative. My husband falls into the average range, for me it isn't about size it is about what you can do with what you have. You said it master oral and have wonderful hands.

[DreamP346]

What is the best penis size is influenced by social and cultural factors. In ancient Greece, the smaller penis was valued (have you noticed the Greek statues have small penis').

Also, here are some facts:
Ansell, makers of LifeStyles Condoms, has conducted research into average penis size. The survey found that the average length of the erect penis is 5.877 inches (14.928cm), with the majority ranging between the small 5.5 inch penis size (14cm) and the large 6.3 inch penises (16cm). The average girth is 4.972 inches (12.63cm), with the majority ranging between 4.7 inches (12cm) and 5.1 inches (13cm). This indicates that the difference between small penis size and large is not very big.

Remember, this is a US study so these measurements can't be applied to other counties. The other thing is people measure in different ways. Is it from the front or the back. That can make a difference.

[time2discover]

Loved it! Alot of reality check in a light way and it states the pure truth about
women's true choices. Good job!

[time2discover]

I think when I will meet someone, we will have a discussion based on our sexual preferences,
what we see happening between us and what is a maker or a breaker for each of us.
Knowing a few details ahead of time, will help to know if you're on the same page with
this person sex wise. In my opinion, if you're not why bother.

[Stillness]

I don't know how big my penis is because I haven't measured it since I was a boy. I never felt the need once I started having sex. My first sexual partner was out of control when I was inside of her, to the point of causing me pain. I've had doubts and wished for a bigger one like most, but not enough to be overly concerned. One of the other pivotal moments in the process of letting this male obsession go was when I was teasing my wife about a banana she was eating early in our relationship. I said I wished my penis was as thick as the fruit. She matter-of-factly told me it's bigger. The fact that she so quickly defended me against my own doubt did more for me than the visual comparison that followed. For the first time in my life my penis looked big and sexy to me.

I think that even if we know how big we are in inches we underestimate what that means in comparison to other things. And if there was a negative experience early on, that can stick just like my positive ones did. I think that the ladies whose husbands have a complex about this (even if it's just the minor one that most men have unless we're hurting someone with our units) might be well served from the confidence it would instill in their man's heart to not just hear how much they please them, but to have an actual visible comparison. A big banana works great.

Also, I disagree with the claim that men on the smaller side need to somehow make up for it with hands and mouths. That implies that they're somehow inadequate or that bigger men don't need to do as much. Every man needs to be a good lover for his wife. The size of the penis doesn't change that. Unless it can't be felt or it's too big to fit, it really doesn't matter.

[caster]

If this is the final-final then say goodby to any new men joining here, seems that's the first thing they want to know. "Do I measure up?"
Good basic info though.

[DreamP346]

The thing with all the penis size threads are that its usually "what do you think, is it small?" Does it really matter! First, we are not this person's sexual partner and second, if it is small, then what. There is nothing you can do about it. I understand the questions if its "will my size satisfy a women?" but not just the need to know what size it is and if we think it is small. If everybody on this forum agreed that the size mentioned is not small, that won't make this person a better lover.

Its like asking "do you think I am short?" Compared to what and if so there is nothing you can do about your height.

Growing up I don't recall penis size being as big an issue. I really think this is another one of the detrimental aspects of living in a society where porn is so easily available. We are still trying to convince women that the super thin models are the exception and not the norm and not very boy wants that. Now its the same think for boys. Not all men are that big and all women do not want that.

[Harmony]

There's no way this will really be the final, I've lost count of how many final penis size threads there are, I just thought it was about time I started one.