[somerandomguy]

Is appearance the most important thing for your? (honestly asking). I asked if you were settling, and you mention the appearance of the women you date.

I have a friend who dated based on appearance - and who went through a series of miserable relationships with women who were not a good match for him, or some who were outright nut-cases .

As you get older would you still want to date young beautiful women?

Well that is the thing. As women get older/more experienced they tend to look for a more mature relationship. At this point they fall in the "love-the-man-accept-the-penis"-category. Before this however, are they still not even remotely interested in a larger penis (mind you, when I say larger I mean as large as the woman can comfortably handle)? Are you telling me that even for a one-night-stand, women would pick the nicer, smaller guy over the somewhat arrogant, bigger one? Even though they are only out for sex?

[Little]

You still have to interact with a person's mind in order to have sex with them. A nasty personality will bleed out into the sex act, affecting it just as much as the size of the tools at hand.

Unless a lady is in the BDSM market, but even then, I imagine that they're looking for an actor, not a jerk.

[somerandomguy]

You still have to interact with a person's mind in order to have sex with them. A nasty personality will bleed out into the sex act, affecting it just as much as the size of the tools at hand.

Unless a lady is in the BDSM market, but even then, I imagine that they're looking for an actor, not a jerk.

I did not necessarily mean a jerk. Just someone you would not introduce to your parents, so to speak. Surely, there must be guys out there who are good enough for sex but not much else. In that case, would the size of the penis still not matter? Like, at all? Not even for a one-nighter?

[rcoreyus]

Even for a one night stand, I'd much prefer a woman who was interesting and exciting but average looking to one who was stunningly attractive but not interesting. Just mechanical sex is really dull - back to my argument of why call-girls have no appeal to me.

[rcoreyus]

I think people into BDSM are even more interested in personality. BDSM is all about playing and acting.

You still have to interact with a person's mind in order to have sex with them. A nasty personality will bleed out into the sex act, affecting it just as much as the size of the tools at hand.

Unless a lady is in the BDSM market, but even then, I imagine that they're looking for an actor, not a jerk.

[Little]

At all - maybe a teeny tiny bit? Just a smidge? Probably not so if the woman choosing has experienced a large penis - as I mentioned in one of the recent predecessors to this thread, a larger than average size is a novelty that I might have been interested in trying out had I never run across one, but I have ... and I found above-average penises to be so similar to average-sized ones as to be indistinguishable. In years and years (and years!) of these threads, the only penis sizes I've heard of that might not be preferable are in the category of micropenises. Not below average - not average - but so small as to be statistically unlikely. Just like the penises you guys are wishing for that are so large as to be statistically unlikely.

Even for a one night stand, I'd much prefer a woman who was interesting and exciting but average looking to one who was stunningly attractive but not interesting. Just mechanical sex is really dull - back to my argument of why call-girls have no appeal to me.

Agreed. Even when I was having casual sex and wasn't interested in a relationship, a partner's personality was still part of the equation. It wouldn't matter how attractive/well-endowed a guy was if I couldn't stand him while I was trying to get dressed again.

[Starfish]

Nice post

[jns]

Even for a one night stand, I'd much prefer a woman who was interesting and exciting but average looking to one who was stunningly attractive but not interesting. Just mechanical sex is really dull - back to my argument of why call-girls have no appeal to me.

I've had sex before with a smoking hot woman or two. All of those days are two decades in the past, so I have a perspective that only comes with time. The women I've had sex with that I remember the best are not the ones that were smoking hot, rather the ones that were more average but were fun to be with. Physical attributes can only go so far. They cannot make up for personality flaws, where you want to be with a woman for sex and then get up and leave before the conversation ruins the memories of the sex. However, in porn, physical attributes and a small amount of faked personality is all you get. After all, they're actors. And the faked personality is not personally directed at the viewer no matter how deep that person is in a fantasy.

Much of this thread is driven by views formed by porn viewing. How many guys have had women say to them that they were too small or act disappointed due to the guy's penis size? A lot of it is assuming what women want by guys who have not got any feedback, sort of how a lot of guys go about having sex with women. The word assume can be split in to three parts with the central part being u (you). The first part is what u and me become when one of us assumes. The best idea is not to assume but find out by asking, then listening to the answers and understanding them -not rejecting them if they are not what you want to hear. Many women have answered and the vast majority if not all have said that penis size is not a consideration, not a major consideration nor a minor consideration unless the guy is well above or below the norm.

[Obelisk]

Would you prefer a 4" vagina over a 7" vagina? How much does it matter to you?

Women are nowhere near the same in the expectation level of whatever vagina size they have. Men never sit there and go "wow what a small vagina" or "what a large vagina" unless it's so small it's uncomfortable, or so large that even a large penis isn't felt as well. There is no measurement a woman is expected to have.

But I guess for men there is one. Anything less than 7" is small for a man. 5-6" is average. 4" or less is very small.

This is what society has deemed to be the scale. I don't really care about the scale. I care about what women's preference is. I think that # depends on their own size and whether too large has hurt, or too small wasn't felt. Apparently this could be all over the place.

As for my preference? I'd like a woman who's ideal size is 6", since I'm very close to that #. I think only smaller women are likely to think 6" is ideal though.

Is appearance the most important thing for your? (honestly asking). I asked if you were settling, and you mention the appearance of the women you date.

I would say that a woman needs to be attractive to me. A woman who is around 5'4 let's say, at around 120lbs she would look great. This is ideal.

The same woman would probably be equally attractive to me until around 140lbs. I'd still consider higher but I'd feel like I'm settling beyond this point. Last gf was 165lbs maybe and 5'2. She started seemingly very sweet, but unfortunately she wasn't what I thought. I did want her to lose weight but she didn't, so I guess I'd say 140lbs is my range.

Is this shallow?

I have a friend who dated based on appearance - and who went through a series of miserable relationships with women who were not a good match for him, or some who were outright nut-cases .

All I get is nut cases. What's appearance to your friend though? I have not dated models only, a couple of girls have been stunning, but I've dated a range.

As you get older would you still want to date young beautiful women?

I'm 34 now. I've never had even a steady gf for more than 4 months. I've never actually had a mutual love between myself and a woman. I think my boat has sailed. I think once I'm 40, if I haven't found someone, I think I'll just throw in the towel.

I look easily 5-7 years younger than I am though. Most people think I'm mid-late 20's.

We'll see what I look like by 40 and see if it's viable for me to keep on chugging or just retire from the search.

Well that is the thing. As women get older/more experienced they tend to look for a more mature relationship. At this point they fall in the "love-the-man-accept-the-penis"-category. Before this however, are they still not even remotely interested in a larger penis (mind you, when I say larger I mean as large as the woman can comfortably handle)? Are you telling me that even for a one-night-stand, women would pick the nicer, smaller guy over the somewhat arrogant, bigger one? Even though they are only out for sex?

You still have to interact with a person's mind in order to have sex with them. A nasty personality will bleed out into the sex act, affecting it just as much as the size of the tools at hand.

Unless a lady is in the BDSM market, but even then, I imagine that they're looking for an actor, not a jerk.

So to translate, the answer is "yes for a one night stand a woman would like a bigger tool, but the guy can't be a tool himself if he wants to use his tool".

At all - maybe a teeny tiny bit? Just a smidge? Probably not so if the woman choosing has experienced a large penis - as I mentioned in one of the recent predecessors to this thread, a larger than average size is a novelty that I might have been interested in trying out had I never run across one, but I have ... and I found above-average penises to be so similar to average-sized ones as to be indistinguishable. In years and years (and years!) of these threads, the only penis sizes I've heard of that might not be preferable are in the category of micropenises. Not below average - not average - but so small as to be statistically unlikely. Just like the penises you guys are wishing for that are so large as to be statistically unlikely.

So unlikely that you've ran into a few in your sexual history, as it seems every woman over 30 has.

Agreed. Even when I was having casual sex and wasn't interested in a relationship, a partner's personality was still part of the equation. It wouldn't matter how attractive/well-endowed a guy was if I couldn't stand him while I was trying to get dressed again.

Again, personality means nothing. A guy with a small penis could be a loser as well. How does that factor into the question at all?

Much of this thread is driven by views formed by porn viewing

My part of it is driven by my disbelief at just how common women seem to run into these "well above the norm" size men.

I didn't care much about the subject until I started reading how common women have experienced 8-9" before.

So now we smaller guys are left at the woman's mercy to "accept" our smaller ones for whatever reasons they come up with.

[rcoreyus]

Just to answer one point, the friend I discussed is a very attractive man, athletic, a good dancer and quite wealthy. His problem is that he looks for appearance above all other qualities - and he's suffered for it.

There is a real difference between wanting your partner to be attractive, and having appearance be the most important parameter. I wouldn't want to date someone I thought was ugly, but I'd definitely prefer a woman I found moderately attractive who's company I enjoyed to the gorgeous woman on earth if we didn't get along.

Why do you think you can't find love as you get older? Lots of people do.

Decades ago before I was with my wife I briefly dated a woman who had had a lot of previous partners. At one point she mentioned a previous partner who was extremely large - and that she didn't really enjoy it. We greatly enjoyed our time together, and separated on good terms - neither of us was what the other was looking for in the long term. We stay in touch (though she lives thousands of miles away). Recently she happened to mention that I was the best sex she had ever had. (very flattering of course). Penis size was never mentioned.

So, yes, many women will have had bigger men than you, but if you learn to be a good lover, YOU will be the one they remember. Think about it: would you rather be remembered as that guy who was hung like a horse, or that guy who was an awesome lover?