I stand by everything I said right up to the end bits. Jondoe, you posed your questions and made assumptions about a whole group of people and that is what I was responding to as well as working from the (bad) assumption that your specific case was with a typical person.
After having read your thread from 2012 I would now see that your wife is a narcissist and there is no fixing that. If all the things you said or assumed about no/low libido people are based on your wife I can see where you'd come away with some skewed ideas. You have another issue altogether, I've known a few narcissists over the years and not one of them could maintain a healthy relationship and not one of them saw any real fault in themselves for any relationship issues. Counseling will not work because a narcissist will never believe there is anything about themselves that they need to change. You may (and have) gotten temporary improvements ONLY because she deemed it in her best interest. If you'd listened to your gut early on you wouldn't be where you are now, but you also wouldn't have your kids. Move on, listen to your gut in the future and find someone who is GGG (good, giving and game to try new things). I wouldn't suggest going outside your relationship for the physical intimacy because even if she told you it was ok, she'd eat you alive for it later, she wouldn't be able to help herself.
After having read your thread from 2012 I would now see that your wife is a narcissist and there is no fixing that. If all the things you said or assumed about no/low libido people are based on your wife I can see where you'd come away with some skewed ideas. You have another issue altogether, I've known a few narcissists over the years and not one of them could maintain a healthy relationship and not one of them saw any real fault in themselves for any relationship issues. Counseling will not work because a narcissist will never believe there is anything about themselves that they need to change. You may (and have) gotten temporary improvements ONLY because she deemed it in her best interest. If you'd listened to your gut early on you wouldn't be where you are now, but you also wouldn't have your kids. Move on, listen to your gut in the future and find someone who is GGG (good, giving and game to try new things). I wouldn't suggest going outside your relationship for the physical intimacy because even if she told you it was ok, she'd eat you alive for it later, she wouldn't be able to help herself.
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