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  • Guest

    Again. You are all right in everything you say. I'm thankful to have your insights and thoughts so I can pull myself out of this ridiculous train of thought. I do suffer from OCD - as you may have noticed - so often, switching off and seeing the rational side of things isn't an easy thing to do. Which is why I often need to work very hard to get out of a particular thought cycle.

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    • CHANDLERS WISH
      • Mar 2008
      • 22440

      Behind all my neurosis there's a very happy man that's found "the one".
      There is nothing wrong with you, other than the fact that your focusing on the wrong reason for your anxiety over all of this..

      It is not that they were taller,are taller, you've never had a problem with women, with your height, with flirting or getting un-wanted attention from females...

      It is that you are a hopeless romantic, for the second time in your life "in love", and you are fearful of losing her, so fearful that you only see these guys, their height and focus on that...

      It is that your IN LOVE again And, as your childhood sweetheart and you didn't work out, you are fearing this relationship...

      Let go of the past, let go of what didn't eventuate, there is always a reason and embrase this one with the confidence you had in your marriage.

      You say "she's the one", that's all you need to know in your heart. It's time to believe again and go with the magic you've found and to smile, in that knowing....

      You are on a different journey, your more mature, so is she and she has left her past behind to be with you... The only words you need to remember are "present and future".

      CW
      PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

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      • Guest

        I do have a counselor. But that's once a week. For the time in between, it's often hard as I have no one to talk or vent with.

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        • Guest

          Wow, that's incredibly uplifting. Thanks for your thoughts and for your time.

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          • Guest

            This place sure does bring a lot of compassionate people together. I am truly overwhelmed by the support I am getting from absolute strangers. I am very, very grateful. I mean it.

            Comment

            • Guest

              Thank you for trying to understand a man who is, by all accounts, almost impossible to understand.

              Comment

              • Texinator
                Veteran Member
                • Sep 2009
                • 5556

                Originally posted by newdewd
                Again. You are all right in everything you say. I'm thankful to have your insights and thoughts so I can pull myself out of this ridiculous train of thought. I do suffer from OCD - as you may have noticed - so often, switching off and seeing the rational side of things isn't an easy thing to do. Which is why I often need to work very hard to get out of a particular thought cycle.
                I've learned that overanalyzing never leads to anything productive. You'll just drive yourself crazy with all the possible "what if" scenarios. Unfortunately, it's more difficult for someone with OCD to switch off than for someone who doesn't have it.

                But if you have to obsess about something... how about this: If she really pays as much attention to size as you worry that she does, could it be that because her previous relationships were with men over six foot tall and because those relationships didn't last, she's now looking for someone under six feet? Then your size is "perfect."

                It could happen. Look at penis size, for example... while there are many women who don't care about penis size, there are actually a few who don't want something that's considered large, because they had some bad previous experiences where either the sex inherently hurt or the man thought his size excused him from making an effort.

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                • whit4488
                  Senior Member
                  • Jun 2009
                  • 138

                  i think its mind over matter, and i believe that if you really believed she was the one, you would conquer this.

                  Comment

                  • Guest

                    Originally posted by whit4488
                    i think its mind over matter, and i believe that if you really believed she was the one, you would conquer this.
                    Actually, it's the fact that she really is the one that is making this so heart breaking for me. I can't seem to get passed this and I know, that if I don't, it's over. Very sad. But right now, that's my reality.

                    Comment

                    • Allie602
                      Veteran Member
                      • Jul 2010
                      • 324

                      Originally posted by newdewd
                      Actually, it's the fact that she really is the one that is making this so heart breaking for me. I can't seem to get passed this and I know, that if I don't, it's over. Very sad. But right now, that's my reality.
                      What is she doing that is making it difficult for you? Can you discuss what ever it is with her?

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