[Something_Awesome]

We assumed the husband was going to be violent... Then, after he tenderly showed his acceptance and understanding, we doubted him. Maybe we should not just expect the worst from him?

As for Chaya being in a relationship with Kiyomi and her husband at the same time, I have to disagree with the majority. I would be devastated if my GF cheated on me with a man or a woman. It isn't just about the sex. I want her commitment. I want her time. I know we (the WH community) spend a lot of time on the sex forum, but sex probably isn't even my favorite thing to do with my GF. We like to hang out a lot, cuddle, and just show affection in other ways. Don't get me wrong though... The sex is wicked good...

I have guy friends I have not seen in months because when I am with my GF I am already with my BEST FRIEND. I don't really give a flip about seeing my guy friends anymore. Any free time we have we spend together. I don't want to split that time with anyone else. Sometimes I will encourage her to go hang out with her girlfriends just to make sure she doesn't break any sisterly bonds, otherwise we are almost always together when I am not working and she doesn't have school.

I feel like if you can possibly handle two relationships, then that may mean that you are using one person to fill a void that the other cannot completely fill. I just can't figure out how so many guys on here can say they are OK with their woman sleeping with other people so long as it's not a guy.

I know I did a lot of rambling, and I don't think I sufficiently expressed myself. I just felt like I had to post something because I would be crushed if my GF slept with another girl.

What is most important right now is for Chaya to figure out if she genuinely loves her husband.

[Patti-here]

I agree to an extent. We can't reprogram our minds like machines. We can shape them somewhat. We don't have to be slaves to every single impulse and thought we experience. We can reason and plan. That was what I meant.

For example, a person that has to make a choice between multiple paths doesn't necessarily want the easy or more immediately pleasurable one. They can weigh the consequences and potential long-term outcomes. Then they can train themselves to base their feelings off of those things. "This heroin feels good now, but what will happen if I keep using it?"

Well heroin is an extreme example still, and no we don’t necessarily always follow the easiest path in life, but 9 times out of 10 we follow the path our heart and emotions have us follow.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Chaya, I would not have forgiven myself for not being able to be on here the last couple of days had something happened.

I think that you are a brave woman to be honest to even approach the subject as an Adult and I do agree that he saw you were upset and his reaction was one of love, compassion and understanding.

For some time your sex life has been next to zero going down hill further. I understand that you now fear if you will have another orgasm and if not how he will feel. But, in true raw, pure love it happens.

Perhaps he will sit back and think how to love you more.

Perhaps you will love him more as a result.

Perhaps everything that occurred was for a reason.

Your comment of you deserve to die, please never say that again as that's wrong.

Some men truly don't see their woman being with another woman as cheating more than anything, exciting.

Some men see it as they aren't man enough and it destroys them.

Your husband has an open mind and for that I am grateful.

I am not sure whether or not you should be alone in your home with your husband for the next week with your baby but that is my honest thought.

Hugs sweet .

Your family here were with you all the way and that makes me smile even if I couldn't be here.

[chaya]

Some of you have expressed a fear that my husband could become violent. You probably base this on the one time he did get mad and throw me on the bed, hurting my arm. He had been drinking and he has kept his promise never to do that again.

He will be home in 2 hours and I expect he will be happy to see me. I intend to ask him to talk to Kiyomi and try and talk her into staying. She will be back tomorrow to get her things.

[Patti-here]

Some of you have expressed a fear that my husband could become violent. You probably base this on the one time he did get mad and throw me on the bed, hurting my arm. He had been drinking and he has kept his promise never to do that again.

He will be home in 2 hours and I expect he will be happy to see me. I intend to ask him to talk to Kiyomi and try and talk her into staying. She will be back tomorrow to get her things.

I hope he can persuade her to stay Hon, there's no real reason for her to leave, unless she really wants to go home ?

[Euphoric]

You have such a kind heart. I sincerely hope that you find happiness and contentment. It is long overdue.

[chaya]

I hope he can persuade her to stay Hon, there's no real reason for her to leave, unless she really wants to go home ?

I think she is afraid of my husband. There is no way she wants to go home since her parents sent her to school here to get rid of her. They were embarrassed by her being a lesbian.

[Patti-here]

she doesn't have any reason to be afraid of your husband, I think he's already shown that.. I don't know how to address the fact that her parents are embarrassed by her being a lesbian, you'd think that in this day and age people would get over that, when I told my Mother I was with another now, she took it quite well..

[Something_Awesome]

she doesn't have any reason to be afraid of your husband, I think he's already shown that.. I don't know how to address the fact that her parents are embarrassed by her being a lesbian, you'd think that in this day and age people would get over that, when I told my Mother I was with another now, she took it quite well..

Another culture, another way of thinking, with a different set of values.

[Patti-here]

Another culture, another way of thinking, with a different set of values.

Japan is a 'very very' advanced country, and I like to think people are just people wherever you're at..