[Guest]

Hi girls, I'm Medi, I'm new to the forums.

I've been having some trouble for, well, a few years now in relationships, and since this is a woman's place, I was hoping it'd be rich in useful insight into the female psyche (as long as you don't mind spilling your closely guarded secrets).

The thing is; I've always been the guy that gets left in relationships, in fact I've only ever broken up with a woman once and it's as if it's come back to haunt me ever since.

But one thing's always struck me in my relationships; I don't always feel a hell of a lot during penetrative sex.

I've had around 6 sexual partners and I've only given two of them vaginal orgasms (unless they faked it) and it felt like a real workout.

And one of them, who I split with a few years back, recently commented during a conversation we had that she thought I had a small penis. I always thought it was sufficient for sex but my most recent girlfriend also left me after a 'dirty weekend' together at my place, during which she said she thought she had small breasts and I let slip about my penis insecurity, though I only briefly mentioned it to make her feel better.

But now it's got me, honestly, feeling totally without my mojo

I also had an ex who I spent three years with who always liked the oral and the foreplay but never seemed too interested in the sex itself.

Now Im not really someone that usually worries about these kind of things but for the last few months it's had me really questioning whether I can ever come to enjoy having sexual intercourse with someone I care about. And moreso about whether THEY'LL ever enjoy it.

So, here are the measurements (I know, I measured my penis. That just reminds me how mad this is driving me). I'm 7 1/4 inches in length and 4 1/4 in girth, and I read a LOT of women saying girth really matters.

It's got me wondering, can my partner's actually 'feel'anything when I'm inside apart from a lot of poking and prodding?

I'm really in the doubts here and Im thinking this has a lot to do with why things ended with people I was with.

I know some girls prefer humongous penises (and also believe that if other women tried them they would too) and some girls are fine with average, but just gimme it straight, is my penis too thin for my woman to enjoy the finalé?

[Caussie]

Hi Medi

I cant give you a women's perspective as I am not one, but if you read some other posts on this forum you will soon find that there is a lot of men hung up on size and few that realise that it is not the size of the dog in the fight but the fight in the dog. Unless the item in question is minuscule, which if the measurements are correct it is not, that is definitely not your problem. Just my two cents, but I see a lot of men on here who seem to think that the size is what its all about; its not. I also think that some blokes just like to write the size down on this forum for some reason. I see no need, but for what it is worth, I am smaller than you in length and about the same in girth and I don't have a problem with it. I would even be happy to say I was below average in the length department but it just doesn't matter.....it is what it is.
I would be spending more time on understanding what women want, emotionally and physically and think less about the size of the appendage. Learn to be a good lover first and the size is really irrelevant.
The best advice I can give is to read as much as you can on turning women on, what they like and don't and put the techniques into practice. It all trial and error and every women is different. There is no golden rule. Oh and base nothing on what you see in porn.

[Guest]

Hi Medi

I cant give you a women's perspective as I am not one, but if you read some other posts on this forum you will soon find that there is a lot of men hung up on size and few that realise that it is not the size of the dog in the fight but the fight in the dog. Unless the item in question is minuscule, which if the measurements are correct it is not, that is definitely not your problem. Just my two cents, but I see a lot of men on here who seem to think that the size is what its all about; its not. I also think that some blokes just like to write the size down on this forum for some reason. I see no need, but for what it is worth, I am smaller than you in length and about the same in girth and I don't have a problem with it. I would even be happy to say I was below average in the length department but it just doesn't matter.....it is what it is.
I would be spending more time on understanding what women want, emotionally and physically and think less about the size of the appendage. Learn to be a good lover first and the size is really irrelevant.
The best advice I can give is to read as much as you can on turning women on, what they like and don't and put the techniques into practice. It all trial and error and every women is different. There is no golden rule. Oh and base nothing on what you see in porn.

I appreciate the response, and honestly, I didn't come here just to write down my dimensions lol.

But growing up, I was the guy with the locker-room phobia, honestly, I didn't hit puberty properly 'til I was about 16 and it gave me real self-confidence issues with women. Where I grew up, we used to all go out together and the girls were pretty raucous, up-front and rude and they were always going on about the size of guys' penises from round the area; of course, at the time, I was getting zero sex from any of them.

About a year later I met my first long-term girlfriend and we were together three years, but as I say, she had no interest in the act of sex, just the foreplay and when I brought her to orgasm that way, we generally then had sex for a few minutes before she complained about pain or a sore tooth or a headache or anything really it seemed. At one point (and this is as an 18 year old man) we went about five months without having intercourse, and eventually split up then afterwards; her decision.

I also had a few one night stands who give me 'little' nicknames, and others who stopped me mid-riff. So I don't know maybe it's just the women from where I live but it can't be a coincidence when four or five different women have had a comment on it.

I generally think I understand pleasing women and what it takes; fingers, mouth, touch. The set up and smell. The build up and the conversation. I know every woman's different and I'd always ask what she likes, but I'd say I'm pretty clued up in that aspect of things; I've never had a complaint as far as the foreplay is concerned, in fact rather the opposite, the noise is usually a give away. But when it comes to intercourse ... it's just not the same, particularly so in one night stands.

There was one girl I met who I had amazing sex with; she was very small, only about 5 feet tall and we used to have rough sex for hours and she'd always orgasm, it was amazing. But we really weren't compatible at all in other ways, sadly. Though, that's been the exception, not the rule. Usually women really enjoy the beforehand and aren't too keen on the final act.

I mean, I have fun with women and a good time but two things about my general sexual experience worry me;

1. It's really, negatively affecting my self-confidence, and not just where the opposite sex is concerned. I feel less sure of myself, less masculine all around and less confident and 'ready to take the world on' when I wake up in the mornings, and;

2. I want to be able to enjoy intercourse! I want it to be a part of sex that my partner, whoever she is, enjoys too, and from what I've gleaned; it seems that for that to happen I need to have a penis that's thicker than what I've got!

So I just really want a woman's perspective to help me out with this. For one I'm pretty sick of being left for someone else and for two I'm avoiding meeting women and have been for months.

I'm not a bad looking guy, I'm 6'1'', weigh between 166 and 175 pounds (slim/athletic), though I'm beginning to bulk out now in my twenties, and I write and study music, play several instruments and I'm currently working on my first graphic novel. I keep clean, well groomed, I stand up straight and I like to go out and enjoy myself. I was brought up with moral values and I'm not the type to go cheating or messing someone around but for some reason I always end up in the lurch; and I'm starting to think it's because of my penis.

[Guest]

I took your advice and had a look around the site for a woman's perspective on penis size, and referenced some polls, had a scroll through and looked at all the girl-talk; the site is very informative. As much as foreplay is important (which I already know), it seems as though most of the women who are satisfied with the actual intercourse, and who get decent sensitivity from it, tend to be with men who have thick penises, and a lot of the advice I'm hearing is that 'it isn't length that matters, it's girth'.

That's quite disheartening considering I have never had any control over my penis size. I'd love to have the required measurements to please the average woman phallically and have them coming back for more, because really, that's the best part of sex, but I suppose I simply don't and there's very little I can do about it apart from get used to not having a lot of intercourse with women I'm with.

Thanks anyway for the advice and for pushing me in the direction of women's opinions on the matter. Confirms what I thought all along, really.

[Guest]

I'd just like to add, from doing some more digging, it seems like women who sleep with men in my penile girth range don't find intercourse pleasurable at all. In fact a lot of them, of average height and average build, say 4.25 inches is thin enough not to even be felt in the vagina apart from when it hits the cervix due to the length. To be honest, I really wouldn't feel like a man at all, if I couldn't have intercourse with someone I was with; and just as bad if they couldn't feel it and started wanting me to use toys and all the rest like some people suggest.

I give up.

[DreamP346]

This topic has been discussed to death. You probably won't get many responses. Do a search on this topic in this section.

[Guest]

This topic has been discussed to death. You probably won't get many responses. Do a search on this topic in this section.

Have a read at my last two posts in this thread. I did a search in the forums and read some posts and referenced polls; and then went to different areas on the web, and found almost unanimously that my penis is too thin and long for the large majority of women to enjoy intercourse. Hence likely why I've had problems keeping any of them around.

[rcoreyus]

If you have problems with women it is extremely unlikely that they are due to your physical measurements, any more than when women have problems with men it is due to breast size. There are some women who care about a man's size, but is is definitely not a majority. You would do much better to think about how you interact with women, than about physical issues. Are you kind, helpful, romantic? Do you respect them, and just as important do you respect yourself. Are you doing something important with your life?

[Guest]

If you have problems with women it is extremely unlikely that they are due to your physical measurements, any more than when women have problems with men it is due to breast size. There are some women who care about a man's size, but is is definitely not a majority. You would do much better to think about how you interact with women, than about physical issues. Are you kind, helpful, romantic? Do you respect them, and just as important do you respect yourself. Are you doing something important with your life?

Always. I grew up in a household where all my parents did was bicker and fight and ignore each other. And I make doubly sure that I do not treat any of my partners the same way. I've also made the silly mistake of getting far too 'involved' and becoming much too on. And I have learnt a lot about the more emotional and practical implications of relationships with women in my dealings with them.

I do my utmost to make sure anyone I am with can come to me openly and freely and allow me to understand how they feel. I used to be quite an outgoing person before I began studying; I don't always have a lot of money but I like to enjoy myself when I do. But these instances with women and their comments about size have kicked my self-confidence and self-respect to rock-bottom if I'm honest.

I treat a woman as I myself would like to be treated by someone. I'm open and honest and I make an effort. Usually women's families love me; all I ever hear is 'you're a real lovely man', or 'you are a real gentleman'.

I pick up the tabs for meals (unless she insists on going dutch) and I always make time for the romantic stuff. I'm also a talented cook and women seem to love that. I enjoy having a laugh and a joke and a meal.

Honestly, I don't feel like I could be doing anything more to be gentlemanly and romantic towards women.

My last girlfriend said when she broke up with me 'You've been the most gentlemanly man I've ever went out with. You honestly couldn't have done any more for me. But I just don't think I'm ready to commit to one man; I have my whole life ahead of me and I want to make a few more mistakes first'.

and yes, I'm writing a novel and I study a few days a week and fit in a part time job there too.

[Guest]

I've just been questioning everything about myself;

Am I not big enough? Am I not exciting enough? Am I not fun enough? Am I not stable enough? Am I not a good laugh? Am I not open and honest? Am I not easy to get along with?

And it feels to me as though these women think I'm a decent, sensible, creative gentlemanly kinda guy but not the one they wanna screw at the weekends. And it's like that old adage; 'no woman is gonna want you if you don't want yourself'. How ironic that I never used to self-loathe or worry so much about women, but I'm beginning to, because all I ever get is let-down and messed about.