[jen1447]

Entire thing was just confusing! First he treats me like a guy friend? Then he bumps it into booty call request mode? Afterwards,?? he texts me from midnight til 5am wanting to know what I am doing? if im ok? ( sorry for the massive long story ) this isn't something you can gossip to friends about... I could use another female opinion

He was probably extremely concerned that you were thinking of contacting the police and wanted to constantly monitor to take your pulse on that so to speak. The fact is that technically he raped you (by the definition of rape in most jurisdictions). The only two things that matter are: you said no; he inserted a finger into a body orifice (I'm assuming your vagina). It doesn't matter that you involuntarily got excited, that's actually not unheard of for rape victims. Be glad that it wasn't violent, but make no mistake about what it was. You should do what the others have suggested - go to the police, and get a lawyer.

edit - sp posted before I saw it, sorry for repeating her.

[Stillness]

mzhk, the general consensus seems to be rape. Do you feel like it was rape? I didn't get the impression that you did from your post.

[PinkySweet]

As you said in the thread.... He was looking for a booty call. Driving around in circles going to different spots sitting in his car is NOT a date.

I agree with others that was he was doing was pretty much sexual assault. Saying your not ready, means no. So that means stop trying. You should have told him to take you home immediately.

[rcoreyus]

If you clearly told him to stop, then it was rape. Probably impossible to prosecute.

[jen1447]

Not necessarily ^ - many states have provisions that declare that corroboration isn't necessary (I assume that's what you mean), for example -

750.520h Corroboration of victim's testimony not required.
Sec. 520h.
The testimony of a victim need not be corroborated in prosecutions under sections 520b to 520g.

[Baboy]

Jen is correct. If the evidence of an independent eyewitness was required in these cases, there would be few prosecutions.

True, this is a "she said, he said" case, but such cases are successfully prosecuted every day. What I take from the original post is this guy drove her around, got her to a remote spot where he was able to force himself upon her, including forced digital penetration. Very grave misconduct and, indeed, quite likely a precursor to even worse against a future victim. At least, pls. take the suggestion to see a counselor, without delay.

[Patti-here]

I know I put myself in the position yesterday? But I'm still confused on how it all happened so quickly? There is this guy that's been hounding me to " hang out ". We don't know know each other? I thought throw on sweat pants and huge shirt? Act a bit loud and not girly? 20 minutes in? He'd excuse himself and leave? Next thing I knew? I wasnt thinking. I should of grabbed a cab home? Instead, I got in his Lincoln Town car? He drives around in circles for a while? He drives me to the lake? seriously start
to HIT on me. Extremely handys so I tell him " Im not ready for whatever it is that your thinking of "?. He says " sorry, I cant help it ". Then, drives me out of there goes into another part of town ONCE again to another lake ...then throws himself at me once again....kissing me in places? then he sticks his finger inside me...starts kissing me again :S I tell him.." I cant I just c an't".
After this? he whips out his penis and says " look what you did.. you made me so hard ". :S I tell him he did it to himself! then he leans over and kisses me AGAIN! whispers" I want you so bad ". Starts up trying to get back down my pants again! puts his finger in me AGAIN!! ( I donno what was wrong with me...my head was shouting this is wrong...I was repeating GET out of there... but strangely? I was MOANING while telling him GET OUT OF THERE )
e d
Afterwards, he gets out... but ends up masterbating in front of me. Then says it took so much to have self control? :S He really wanted me right there... how the heck does sweat pants and massive T shirt say WELCOME ******** me? After the entire thing? he drives me home.. on the way home he went REALLy quiet. When he drove me home? He ends up saying he's sorry for throwing himself on me? Hopes I don't hate him....

Entire thing was just confusing! First he treats me like a guy friend? Then he bumps it into booty call request mode? Afterwards,?? he texts me from midnight til 5am wanting to know what I am doing? if im ok? ( sorry for the massive long story ) this isn't something you can gossip to friends about... I could use another female opinion

That's at the very least sexual assault, but the longer you wait to report it, the less chance you have of proving it...

[Patti-here]

You should be talking with a victims rights advocate A.S.A.P.

[Motorguy]

I know I put myself in the position yesterday? But I'm still confused on how it all happened so quickly? There is this guy that's been hounding me to " hang out ". We don't know know each other? I thought throw on sweat pants and huge shirt? Act a bit loud and not girly? 20 minutes in? He'd excuse himself and leave? Next thing I knew? I wasnt thinking. I should of grabbed a cab home? Instead, I got in his Lincoln Town car? He drives around in circles for a while? He drives me to the lake? seriously start
to HIT on me. Extremely handys so I tell him " Im not ready for whatever it is that your thinking of "?. He says " sorry, I cant help it ". Then, drives me out of there goes into another part of town ONCE again to another lake ...then throws himself at me once again....kissing me in places? then he sticks his finger inside me...starts kissing me again :S I tell him.." I cant I just c an't".
After this? he whips out his penis and says " look what you did.. you made me so hard ". :S I tell him he did it to himself! then he leans over and kisses me AGAIN! whispers" I want you so bad ". Starts up trying to get back down my pants again! puts his finger in me AGAIN!! ( I donno what was wrong with me...my head was shouting this is wrong...I was repeating GET out of there... but strangely? I was MOANING while telling him GET OUT OF THERE )
e d
Afterwards, he gets out... but ends up masterbating in front of me. Then says it took so much to have self control? :S He really wanted me right there... how the heck does sweat pants and massive T shirt say WELCOME ******** me? After the entire thing? he drives me home.. on the way home he went REALLy quiet. When he drove me home? He ends up saying he's sorry for throwing himself on me? Hopes I don't hate him....

Entire thing was just confusing! First he treats me like a guy friend? Then he bumps it into booty call request mode? Afterwards,?? he texts me from midnight til 5am wanting to know what I am doing? if im ok? ( sorry for the massive long story ) this isn't something you can gossip to friends about... I could use another female opinion

Well MZHK I am going to jump on the band wagon and agree whole heartily this guy is a predator and really should be in prison. He was touching you and inserted his fingers in you with out your consent along with kissing you and feeling you up. When he drop you off your first call should had been to the police and have him arrested.This is not the first time he's probably done this he is a true hearted predator and needs to be lock up like a animal. I feel other women would agree with us guys this was so wrong on every level.

[Stillness]

The answer to your question, mzhk, is that we don't all want sex on the first date. Some people (men and women) do. Not all of us are aggressive like that.

Unless you say different, I'm not seeing what everyone else is seeing. You seems to describe a situation in which you reluctantly let him do some stuff you were uncomfortable with but sort of enjoyed, not one in which you were physically overpowered or made to feel afraid or threatened. When you defiantly tell him "no" he stops. Am I right?