Sex On First or Second Date and Later

68% of people have had sex on a first date and according to our research, the likelihood of sexs rise in tandem with the number of alcoholic beverages consumed.
split screen image showing an aerial view of a couple having coffee together on the left and a chart depicting that 59% of men are willing to have sex on the first date and 43% of women said the same on the right
Updated:November 2023

Through our research at Women’s Health Interactive, we discovered that 69% of people consider the decision of when to have sex with a new partner on a case-by-case basis and 9% go for it on the first date. [1]

Conversely, 68% of people in that same survey reported having had sex on a first date in the past. [1]

Although not always a factor, one study noted that 41% of first dates led to sex if 4 alcoholic drinks were consumed. [2]

This article contains a collection of the most relevant statistics and data about sex on the first (or second) date, including how common it is, why people do it (or don’t), and which age group or gender does it more frequently.

Key Statistics To Know:

  • 69% of people say that they decide how soon to have sex on a case-by-case basis. [1]
  • 68% of people reported having sex on a first date in the past. [1]
  • 41% of first dates led to sex if 4 drinks were consumed on the first date, compared to only 10% of first dates leading to sex when zero alcoholic beverages were consumed. [2]
  • 29% of survey respondents cited a cocktail bar or brewery as their preferred location for a first date. [1]
  • Only 2.9% of survey respondents cited sex as being the best topic to discuss during a first date. [1]
  • Men are more likely than women to proceed with and expect sex on a first date. [3]
  • Millennials are 48% more likely to have sex on or before the first date compared to other generations. [5]

Sex on the first date isn’t always planned; sometimes it just happens.

People have sex as early as the first or second date for various reasons, and the people who do it tend to do it on a case-by-case basis, because it has to feel right.

Frequency Of Sex On The First Date

donut chart depicting that 68% of people report having sex on a first date in the past
  • One survey of 1,200 adults found that 68% of respondents have had sex on the first date before. [1]
  • 69% of survey respondents said they decide how soon to have sex on a case-by-case basis. [1]
  • Although topics of conversation vary, only 2.9% of respondents said that “sex” is the best topic of conversation on a first date. [1]
  • 10.4% of survey respondents reported becoming exclusive with a partner after having sex. [1]
  • Only 6.8% of respondents said that one date was long enough to know they are in love with someone, while 86.6% said it takes four dates or more. [1]

Frequency Of Sex On The Second Date (Or Later)

bar graph depicting answers to the question "when dating someone, how long before you have sex": 9.4% of people said first date; 5.5% said second date; 7.2% said third date; 6.7% said fourth date or beyond

After being asked, “When dating someone, how long before you have sex,” [1]:

  • 9.4% of respondents said the first date
  • 5.5% said the second date
  • 7.2% said the third date
  • 6.7% said the fourth date or beyond

Frequency Of Sex On The First Date When Alcohol Is Involved

bar graph depicting the likelihood of sex on the first date based on the number of alcoholic drinks consumed: 10% no alcohol, 17% with 2 drinks, 24% with 3 drinks, 41% with 4 drinks, and 51% with 5 drinks.

American Addiction Centers surveyed just over 1,000 people to learn more about their first-date drinking behaviors. [2]

  • 86% of respondents reported drinking alcohol during a first date.
  • 41% of first dates ended in sexual intercourse if 4 drinks were consumed during the date, and 51% of first dates ended in sex if 5 or more drinks were consumed during the date.
  • Only 10% of first dates led to sex if zero alcoholic beverages were consumed.
  • Even if you only have 2 or 3 drinks on a first date, you’ll still be increasing your odds of first-date sex. 17% of the participants’ dates led to sex if they had 2 drinks, and 24% led to sex if they had 3 drinks.
  • This data illustrates that if you drink on the second date, third date, or any date — it will more likely lead to sex. Drinking alcohol statistically increases the odds of intimate behavior.

It’s also worth noting that 29% of respondents in a separate survey cited a cocktail bar or brewery as their preferred location for a first date. [1]

Sex Frequency On The First Date: By Gender

graphic depicting that 59% of men reported being willing to have sex on the first date compared to 43% of women reporting the same

Sexual wellness brand Lovehoney conducted a survey of over 2,000 adults on the topic of sex on the first date.

  • More men than women have had sex on the first date. 59% of the male respondents claimed to have had sex on date number one, compared to only 43% of female respondents. [3]
  • In a research paper by Mary Claire Morr and Paul Mongeau, First Date Expectations, the researchers found data that indicates higher expectations by men when it comes to expecting sex on the first date. [4]

“Specifically, in studies based on hypothetical date scenarios, men reported higher sexual expectations for first dates than did women, particularly when the woman initiated the date,” researchers Morr and Mongeau noted.

“Contrary to these expectancies, research on actual first dates indicates that less sexual and communication intimacy occurs on first dates initiated by women.”

“Men likely enter female-initiated first dates with unrealistically high sexual expectations,” they continued. “In contrast, a woman’s expectations may be violated if a man acts on his higher expectations for sexual intimacy.”

Sex Frequency On The First Date: By Age

graphic depicting that those aged 18-29 are most likely to have sex on a first date
  • Those aged 18–29 are the most sexually promiscuous — and the age group most likely to go back to someone’s place on the first date. [6]
  • Those in the 18–29 age group are also more likely to kiss at the end of a first date: 9% doing so always, 22% usually, and 34% sometimes. [6]
  • Those aged 60 and older are least likely to end the date with so much as a kiss; 41% cite that they rarely or never do it. [6]

Why Do People Have Sex On The First Date?

bar graph depicting the reasons why people have sex on a first date: 53% said they have sex on a first date because they enjoy sex, 46% do it to speed up sexual connection with their date, 26% do it to discover sexual compatibility early on, and 20% cite wanting to see if their kinks will be accepted before they emotionally invest in the relationship
  • 53% of Lovehoney’s survey respondents said that they had sex on the first date because they simply enjoy sex. [3]
  • 46% of respondents say they made the choice in order to discover if they’re sexually compatible early on. [3]
  • 26% said that sex on the first date allows them to make a faster connection on a sexual level. [3]
  • 20% of respondents said they have sex on a first date as a method of kink acceptance before getting emotionally involved with their new partner. [3]
  • 16% of respondents said that sex on the first date calms their nerves. [3]

Why Do People Avoid Sex On The First Date?

bar graph depicting that 47% of people don't feel comfortable having sex with someone they don't know, 38% don't believe in having sex on the first date, and 32% need an emotional connection before they can enjoy sex
  • 47% of survey participants stated that they choose not to have sex that early because they don’t feel comfortable having sex with someone they don’t really know. [3]
  • 38% said they simply don’t believe in the concept of having sex on a first date. [3]
  • 32% of respondents said they need an emotional connection formed before they can enjoy a sexual interaction, which is a big reason why they don’t have sex on a first date. [3]
  • 25% of survey respondents have a “rule” about not sleeping with someone on a first date. [3]
  • 17% cited being conscious of pregnancy and STIs as the reason for avoiding sex on a first date. [3]

Sources