[WildChild]

Yes you did!!

[cassie66]

really? doesnt feel like much of a victory
yesterday we went to pet shop and he saw some degus up for adoption and kept going on and on ssaying he wants then i said we cannot afford them and we have no cage he kept saying can you lent me £100 i saodno and anyway the banks are shut its easter i said if you really want them buy them when your cheque is cleared. he stopped going on about them then

what makes me mad is its ok for him to say all his money is spoken for and cannot possibly spend any on us, yet he still goes on about be given him by last penny that not right
on the 3 credit cards he owes a total of 23k and his 4,600 wont make much of a dent
now he is saying he will get bits like pc stuff and the degus saying a few hundred wont make much of a diff
another hairbrained scheme of his is kets go on a driving holiday in next half term., yeah great but id be paying! so much as id love a break, he has a cheque and will not use that i asked him to spend some money on us, but oh no we cant touch his money, but its ok to use mine!
2 of my kids gone to their dads this weekend, eldest stayed here to see freinds
sometimes i cannot help but cry, i must be too sensitive, i just cannot stop the tears myabe its my situation, or the fact his demands are getting to me i dnt know but its hard.
every day seems like a battle, a si never know what mood he will be in

i cannot sleep on couch as he threw away all my spare duvets. said all my stuff was old.
it doesnt matter anyway as he sleeps so far on edge of bed its a wondder he dont fall off

i feel so stressed.
i shall come on here as often as i can.
he is back to work tues morning on early shift.
thanks for been my freinds im trying to keep sane

[cassie66]

well this morning he is pulling the im sore game again he kept saying look cant you see the cuts
no i couldnt all i could see was a dirtry ring mark around the tip i said its cos your not washing it he says its dry skin and it hurts. what is he playing at?
i ache for some love making all i get is mind games

[CHANDLERS WISH]

No one said it was easy, Cassie, but you did it again, you said not, you said use your own money and that was it, it was dropped.

Two down, more to go.

Sorry about the lounge, but you know, pull his off him and tell him to wear his tracks, if he gets to you and then go to the lounge.

lol.

Speak to you Tues, happy easter. !!!

CW

[WildChild]

Good job Cassie you are growing a back bone. It can be painful but you need one! Don't think of love making with him, think of it with someone caring and tender, who bathes! He is a manipulative child. He wants what he wants without any rational thought. He wants toys, pets, his bills paid. Like a kid with birthday money, he wants to spend what he gets on himself even though there isn't enough to pay the bills.

You married an immature thinker, an over grown child, an emotional manipulator - it takes more than years and size to be a man - he will never be one. It's interesting your dad can't see him for what he is...makes me wonder. Your father is a yeller, critisizer, who cuts you down - how much like him, really, is your husband? Did you just marry a little different version?

You are maturing and growing through this, learning to stand up for yourself and that will serve you well in the future. You didn't think you could do it at all and now you are. There may come a point where he gives you a big, showy resistance, really pitches a fit and if you stand your ground then (it may last a few days), I think he will fold there after. You must stay clear as to your goals, You are getting out, correcting this mistake, going to become self supporting and learning to take care of things for yourself! You CAN do this. Millions of women do! You don't have to have a man in your life to live a good life, in this case you will have a better life without him.

[cassie66]

he is messing with pc parts in other room. he has spent most of day on a train game and looking at how to build a shuttle
i just feel a bit low at the moment i dnt feel like im winning
i just wanted to be with a man who never shouts at me someone who will love me for what i am
him called me very selfish today thats not fair i may be alot of things, but im not selfish
he keeps going on about his bits been sore not my problem as i dnt believe him

he actually had a shower today lol been 5weeks he needs a haircut too and the dentist
maybe i thought i could change him i doubt that
all he talks about is money, pc bits games and new pets he always has new daft ideas
happy easter to all

[WildChild]

Rule #1 never go into a relationship thinking you can change someone. Only they can decide to or do so. You can be a the motivation but you can make it happen.

Honey, this isn't a situation where you are going to come out, arms in the air, V for victory. The best you can hope for these sorts of situations is to get out as unscathed as possible. He has only himself to think of and that is all he ever has or will think of, you have yourself and your kids. He knows he can always weadle something out of mum, you need to have a clear mind set of you for yourself!

Did he put on the hot water for himself?

Sore or not his bits should not interest you! You are moving on and preparing to move out, don't complicate the situation for yourself!
Quit thinking about wanting to be with a man. First you need to learn to be with and care for your self. Then and only then can you safely consider letting a man into your life and you don't have to marry or live with him to have a good relationship.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Apart from what WC said.

He is bringing it up cause, your not asking for sex anymore, it's a game, can't get you with the money, you said NO, (twice), so if you reply to him regarding his dirty little thing ( smile), then he gets to say NO... remember that, so don't bite.

You will find this guy you look for, not in this guy but from the strength you are gaining now one day in the near future.......

Keep moving in this positive direction Cassie, and "without your name and address' when he is gone to work, write to us your resume so we can give you tips and then send it to every restaurant/hospital for cleaning, dishes, what ever doesn't matter..

CW

[WildChild]

If you want to do that it might be best to make that a PM?

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Sure, if you want to Private Message it to me and let me know if you want anyone else to have a look at it, ie) WC, or a professional by all means.

CW