[a_dub]

Jeez, I don't understand why you have to attack me so personally. Nevermind, I do understand, I'm just pretending not too while I smirk as I type this out. Sorry, had to say it.

OK, so I have a problem. I don't see why I have to be villified for it. Are you gonna make fun of me and my premature ejaculation too? How about kids who have Down Syndrome? Now thats a laugh and a half, right? I don't see why you're so angry at me...I never shot you down. If you have a BF who is not like me, rejoice, but you don't have to try and rag on me.

I'm sorry. I really am. I'm going to try to change, and I appreciate the insights you've provided. You don't have to believe me, but I ain't lying.

Btw, yes I know women have fake boobs and fake nails, and use makeup. But I didn't know they use like fake eyelashes and fake hair ALL the time!

[a_dub]

Btw, there are plenty of "normal" girls who are 7s and 8s...less 9s and hardly any 10s, but I'm not even looking for that.

[ItsASecret]

Jeez, I don't understand why you have to attack me so personally.

I apologize if you thought it was attacking, I am not trying to attack you. I am simply stating my opinion by what you have described, and those descriptions collectively make it difficult to respond without mentioning things like editing and that the women you meet are not under so much editing. Your previous comments about wanting this and that about a woman does make it difficult to have readers respond without commenting on how things simply are not the way you may have previously envisioned. It can be a gut reaction for any women when a man says things like "well she has to be hot for me to want her", well women are going to inevitably say that appearance is not everything. That is not anger or attacking on her part but it is commenting on the reaction of what he says. As others have said, including myself, you can have your dreams and wants and such but there is a limit to those dreams and that is what you have infront of you. That ideal woman for your lifeplan is out there for you, that within the 3.5 billion women odds you gave are still an incredibly high number when you think about it. There are plenty of women out there for you, you just need to open up more.

[a_dub]

Gotcha. Understood.

[acerousme]

Whoa now...play nicely boys and girls.
Nobody is attacking anyone. Now, as this conversation is still within the rules, Im not going to edit this. But Im only going to give one warning. Then you'll get infractions.

And not all women have fake boobs, hair, nails, eyelashes, etc...I dont have any of those

[Hopeless Dork]

my point is just... your idea of a 10, you have to take the time to realize that 10 isn't a 10 all day long, every day of the week. In order to lose some of the self described 'delusional' notions, its best to quit grading and rather seek out females you are attracted to, and realize that they don't have to be maxim shoot ready. If you really do start realizing the smoke and mirrors that is 'perfection'... you can appreciate beauty at various levels of your grading curve.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Pointing out facts so that you may be able to understand those facts is not attacking

Also, remember you wrote "after" things that you are aware of with women, not in the previous post, I would have said WTF? Seriously? Myself due to the fact you are not 19... So you know... Think before you type, read before you react...

It may pay you to gain some women "friends" and gossip with them.. And, in addition read women's magazines, seriously.

Un-fortunately (not all) but the younger girls and whilst you are what 29? You may be seeking even younger ladies, and those ladies like to follow trend... Weddings are different, women like to look special it's a wedding... They may get false eyelashes, or hair extentions for the day, lord I thought of it myself as a future bride to be But having said that ultimately, I don't wear much make-up anymore, I prefer more natural.

Age does that..

[a_dub]

Also, remember you wrote "after" things that you are aware of with women, not in the previous post, I would have said WTF? Seriously? Myself due to the fact you are not 19... So you know... Think before you type, read before you react...

I might not be 19, but my relationships with women haven't been very extensive either. My cousin had sex with more girls by 19 than I have fantasized about in my life, lol. He probably doesn't know half that stuff since he hasn't been in too many relationships either.

It may pay you to gain some women "friends" and gossip with them.. And, in addition read women's magazines, seriously.

I have a couple of women friends who have been coaching me to get over my fear of rejection and approach women I do like. And I read this forum quite regularly, does that count?

[ItsASecret]

I have a couple of women friends who have been coaching me to get over my fear of rejection and approach women I do like. And I read this forum quite regularly, does that count?

Education is absolutely a good start, you just have to watch which education you get. Gossip with girls is good because it comes first hand you know? You learn that hey they do doll themselves up a heck of a lot when I see them at the bar for example. Then ask them as a hypothetical situation what they would prefer a man does when that man may be interested in them. They may say "do not wear a shirt like that guy is wearing over there", okay that is a tip, then move onto how they would like to be talked to, if the girls say "well do not open with you are hot babe" girls want a guy to like them for them not based on how they look. Just go through a whole list of questions and tell your friends that you honestly just want to understand girls more, I absolutely love it when a guy friend of mine who has a hard time getting dates asks me these types of questions because it shows he cares enough to ask another girl for their opinion. Not enough guys show that sort of concern. You can look at girls magazines too, I hate reading them lol but about 70-80% of the material in magazines are just images of how to doll yourself up with X,Y,Z type eyeliner, sparkly eyeshadow, "this is a model with our lipgloss" and so on until you get to the information about girls wanting guys to say A,B,C to them.

On the other side of that is the horrible advice. No offense but your cousin would be an example of that, he says he has not been in a relationship with many girls but he is willing to basically do any girl with a pulse. That is not good relationship advice if he is just using the women as quickie material and off to the next one. If he is now married he may say "dude best advice I can give is to just settle down with a girl and not be all crazy about them like I was before". That sort of advice is good, but the bad advice is things like "yeah bro just hit it and quit it who cares", or "man just hit up that babe she is so drunk right now". If you are looking to settle down with a woman in your life then you should start by not acting like the guy in the bar but the gentleman who opens the door on the street for the nice pretty lady. One tid bit of advice is even if you do not get a girls number or have her go out with you, if you still manage to get her to smile or laugh while talking to her you are well on your way to finding a girl. That alone is a good sign that you are doing something right, so do the same thing with another girl. Many guys cannot get the genuine smile or laugh, they may be able to get the rolling of the eyes smile and laugh but that is not what the goal should be.

[a_dub]

Education is absolutely a good start, you just have to watch which education you get. Gossip with girls is good because it comes first hand you know? You learn that hey they do doll themselves up a heck of a lot when I see them at the bar for example. Then ask them as a hypothetical situation what they would prefer a man does when that man may be interested in them. They may say "do not wear a shirt like that guy is wearing over there", okay that is a tip, then move onto how they would like to be talked to, if the girls say "well do not open with you are hot babe" girls want a guy to like them for them not based on how they look. Just go through a whole list of questions and tell your friends that you honestly just want to understand girls more, I absolutely love it when a guy friend of mine who has a hard time getting dates asks me these types of questions because it shows he cares enough to ask another girl for their opinion. Not enough guys show that sort of concern. You can look at girls magazines too, I hate reading them lol but about 70-80% of the material in magazines are just images of how to doll yourself up with X,Y,Z type eyeliner, sparkly eyeshadow, "this is a model with our lipgloss" and so on until you get to the information about girls wanting guys to say A,B,C to them.

On the other side of that is the horrible advice. No offense but your cousin would be an example of that, he says he has not been in a relationship with many girls but he is willing to basically do any girl with a pulse. That is not good relationship advice if he is just using the women as quickie material and off to the next one. If he is now married he may say "dude best advice I can give is to just settle down with a girl and not be all crazy about them like I was before". That sort of advice is good, but the bad advice is things like "yeah bro just hit it and quit it who cares", or "man just hit up that babe she is so drunk right now". If you are looking to settle down with a woman in your life then you should start by not acting like the guy in the bar but the gentleman who opens the door on the street for the nice pretty lady. One tid bit of advice is even if you do not get a girls number or have her go out with you, if you still manage to get her to smile or laugh while talking to her you are well on your way to finding a girl. That alone is a good sign that you are doing something right, so do the same thing with another girl. Many guys cannot get the genuine smile or laugh, they may be able to get the rolling of the eyes smile and laugh but that is not what the goal should be.

Thats really good stuff! My cousin is 23 now (5-6 years younger than I am) and he pretty much sleeps with a new girl every other week, if not every week. He lives in New York City and says the number of readily available sex partners in such a large demographic area means that no one really wants to settle into a relationship. I think he's actually almost gotten into a relationship a few times, but he has this thing where he will not allow himself to get "oneitis". He's basically backed out of relationships with girls he really liked, simply becaause he hates the idea of falling in love. I think he eventually wants to settle down, but I doubt it. Yeah maybe when he's 35, but by that time there probably won't be a woman left on this planet he hasn't already slept with. But on the plus side, relevant to this thread, he would never prefer masturbation over real sex, lol!

Anyways, I digressed quite a bit. One of my close female friends has told me that I need to dress a certain way, and act like a gentleman, and develop some sort of rapport before asking a girl out. Another friend has told me to screw the fear and ask out every single attractive girl I see. So I'm working on that right now, and I feel quite fortunate to have a couple of female friends who I can talk openly about stuff. Oh, and they both hate my reliance on watching porn (I usually watch a few hours every week). But I watch it due to boredom and curiosity...its the closest I can get to sex right at this moment. But maybe their negative reaction is because women are usually less porn-friendly then men are.