[Guest]

lol! so now you want all women to feel insecure about themselves if their man watches porn.

absolutely not. i would hope that no woman would have to go through that.

as i've said before, there are probably people who can watch it - enjoy it - and walk away unharmed maybe. sounds like you would fall into that category.

even still, you can't account for the wrecked lives that are left in the wake of making all that porn you and your husband enjoy. somebody's little girl has to be devalued, often times mercilessly, in order for you to have that product in your hands. maybe you don't see that as your problem.

and maybe this is just a matter of preference, but i would suggest to you that there's a problem with "sometimes you just need a quick release, you do not always feel like having sex because it takes more effort."

there are no real shortcuts in life. that effort you're speaking of is exactly what strong relationships are built upon. i'm not saying your marriage isn't strong. i wouldn't know. i'm just saying that the quick release without any effort is exactly the danger that so many women on this forum have fallen victim to.

when it becomes easier to get off with the computer or dvd player - no effort, no communication, no responsibility, no intimacy - just an effortless orgasm that's all about you, not the two of you.

that's a dangerous thing to indulge, i would say.

assuming you're both fairly young - imagine how much effort it will take when you've been married 35 years and your bodies have changed. you have less energy.

how much easier will it be then to flip open the laptop & get off, when the alternative seems so exhausting?

seems to me that what you're describing - the effortless porn & solo sex - is something that is perfectly designed to pull two people apart, not bring them together.

[hotdogg]

now i am starting to get fed up with the narrow minded comments!

now i have been married for 8 years and i still have a great sex life! so your little theory goes straight out the window!

how can porn affect my sex life! i watched porn before i met my hubby! now if your little theory was correct then i would'nt have ever got with my husband.

now has already stated i have a high sex drive, so if i just masterbate and use my imagination is that OK, or am i still putting my marriage at stake?

now you need to get REAL! people still find other people attractive, YOU KNOW LOOK BUT DON'T TOUCH. also i find it very insulting to assume all women in porn are victims. plently of women go into porn and they know what they are letting themselves in for. to state other wise means you think women are too stupid to know what they are doing.

anyway for the record i do not believe you are a man like you claim to be! your argument sounds like it came from a feminist, who is on the war path.

[gcourt]

Now wait I am a feminist and i don't hate porn...just thought I would clear that up. In fact I am very proud to be a feminist and also very proud to be intune with my own sexual desires. I think they go hand in hand.

[hotdogg]

sorry gcourt i did not mean that i think all feminists are anti porn!

generally it is usually certain types of feminists and religous nuts that are so against porn!

most feminists believe that women have the right to do what they like with their life including having sex with who ever they want with out being demonised for it. ( i agree with that ).

[Guest]

yes, thank you for clarifying that. i am anything but a feminist. i think feminism is one of the worst things to have happened to women in america.

i also think it's a tragic irony that pornographers are boastful about their abuse of girls - their devaluing of women - and it's women, in fact self-proclaimed feminists, who are protecting their rights to do it.

it's the group of people (feminists) who claim that they are most interested in furthering the rights & the value of women who are standing behind the group of people (pornographers) that are working the hardest to destroy the value of women.

tragic.

and hotdizzle. wait just a minizzle. you need to chizzle, fo ****zle.

you're getting worked up - i'm not attacking you. not attacking your marriage or your husband. i'm sure you have a great marriage & a thriving sex life. i think you might be missing my point. i'm saying that even if you are one of the few who can dabble in porn and walk away unharmed - that is, your marriage, your relationship with your husband, it's all fine. even still, your ability to get into porn with no impact does not redeem the porn industry. it's still an evil, destructive force because it abuses women. it perpetuates stereotypes. it propagates unrealistic expectations regarding sex.

if either of you are in touch with your sexuality - open, secure, experimental - it wasn't porn that got you there. if you're healthy sexually AND into porn - you're healthy in spite of porn, not because of it.

now, about the woman's right to choose whether or not to enter porn. issue is whether or not a girl's choice to do porn excuses the pornographers' choice to purposely exploit & abuse her. that's really just a matter of opinion. mine, obviously, is that it doesn't. these guys are doing things that will scar these girls forever - hinder their ability to be intimate & to enjoy sex. they're devaluing them & dehumanizing them for film - but they're not acting. it's real. that's inexcusable in my book. especially when most of them are in their 40's & 50's and most of the girls entering porn are 18. pardon the patronizing comment, but they really don't know any better in many cases. most are lost, hurting, from broken situations. porn offers what looks like easy money. "i'll just turn off the switch inside & f*ck a few guys on camera. no big deal."

it is a big deal, though. the fact that a switch has to be turned off tells us something - she has to numb herself. the pornographers don't care. they can make money off of her choice to subject herself to that kind of harm - so they do. then we all go home happy saying it was the girl's choice - and she's an empowered woman, able to make her own choices.

nobody's denying her ability - or right - to choose whether or not to do porn. i'm saying it doesn't matter - it doesn't excuse the pornographer OR the viewer when we know it was an abusive situation. they're making money off of her abuse & viewers are getting pleasure from it.

but look - if you guys can read the box covers (they actually promote their product by stating the obvious: "we're here to devalue women") & actually watch the videos & conclude that what these guys are doing is healthy - that the girls are not being devalued - then i think we're beyond any common ground.

it's a little like arguing over the color of the sky. it's just such an obvious, undeniable fact - it makes the argument silly.

consider these QUOTES from those in the industry:

“My whole reason for being in this Industry is to satisfy the desire of the men in the world who basically don't much care for women and want to see the men in my Industry getting even with the women they couldn't have when they were growing up.”
- former porn actor and Free Speech Coalition board member, Bill Margold

"We at Pure Filth know exactly what you want, and we're giving it to you. Chicks being a*s-f*cked till their sphincters are pink, puffy and totally blown out. Adult diapers just might be in store for these *****s when their work is done."
--from the box cover of "Anally Ripped *****s"

" Women were born with three holes for one purpose: To cram a c*ck deep inside every cuddly cavity! Like true c*ck sockets, our *****s subject their beautiful bodies to the nastiest 4-way debauchery ever lensed. We capture five starry-eyed ****s getting wild and testing the limits of carnal ****-consumption. They redefine raunchy and stretch the limits of a*s, mouth, and p*ssy penetration."
- Promotional copy for Zero Tolerance - No Holes Barred "

here's a description of a review of a very popular movie from a very popular movie line:

"Two in the Seat #3" is a 2003 release from Red Light District that consists of six separate scenes in which two men have sex with one woman, culminating in double-penetration (d.p.), in which the woman is penetrated vaginally and anally at the same time. In one scene, 20-year-old Claire, her hair in pigtails, says she has been in the industry for three months. Asked by the off-camera interviewer what will happen in the scene, she replies, "I'm here to get pounded." The two men who then enter the scene begin a steady stream of insults, calling her "a dirty, nasty girl," "a little f*cking c*nt," "a little ****." After the standard progression of oral and vaginal sex, she asks one to "Please put your c*ck in my a*s." During the double-penetration on the floor, her vocalizations sound pained. She's braced against the couch, moving very little. The men spank her, and her buttock is visibly red. One man asks, "Are you crying?" which leads to this exchange:
Claire: "No, I'm enjoying it."
Man: "****, I thought you were crying. It was turning me on when I thought you were crying."
Claire: "Would you like me to?"
Man: "Yea, give me a f*cking tear. Oh, there's a f*cking tear."
As the first man prepares to ejaculate into her mouth, she says, "Feed me your c*m" and then displays it in her mouth for the camera. "Swallowed," she says. The second man tells her to "spit all over my d*ck, b*tch." After he ejaculates she wipes the semen off her face with her fingers and eats it. The interviewer asks how her a*shole feels. "Feels great. A little raw, but that's good," she says.

OK ladies. this is not some underground hard-to-find smut. this is mainstream porn that can be rented right down the street in anytown, USA.

and you honestly will argue that it is healthy? that this 20-year old girl is not being exploited & abused?

please tell me i'm misunderstanding you here.

or help me enjoy the irony: feminists - people who are interested in the equal valuing of women & men - are supporting an industry that tells us women are born with 3 holes for one reason...to cram...

oh yes. you guys are doing a world of good for the feminist movement. i think if we all could believe - as you seem to - that the only reason women have 3 holes is to have them crammed full of c*ck, then we might just see the day when women are treated equally - really valued for who they are, not just seen as objects.

you're making complete sense.

no, really.

[stiggybird]

yeah.....

it can sometimes be a little offensive to a partner almost like they get a better kick outta some other woman better then the one they actually spend time with.
fair enough if the guy just wants to have a wank, because its natural and a woman can always have sex with them, so yeah a bit of motivation doesnt hurt; but its when they start to neglect their partner.
it depends what mood im in, sometime i dont mind the concept of porn- thats if im crabby and cant be arsed with him tryin to get all over me lol, but if i catch him half way through y'know with a porno mag and im up for it then ill just get ****ed off lol.
its a cycle, you cant avoid getting kicked up the ****- but somethimes you do the kicking.

[stiggybird]

lol but wait...

my bf gets so jealous when i talk about all the hot people i like such as johnny depp and wentworth miller, and the fact i have a few giant posters of them really gets to him; women tend to be more discreet about masturbation which makes it 'ok' lol the fact i get turned on about those giant posters isnt a problem, and because they are topless sorta makes it porn, yet my bf watches dvd's and im not bothered because i dont want to be a hippocirt i just let him get on with whatever he wants to do- and i dont stop what im doing either.
in fact if i look at them in the same way i look at my bf sometimes, then he gets really mad.. then goes to release some steam by putting on a dvd and having a really angry wank.
lmao!
cycle.... told you.

[ch1cka]

I'm a 24 year old educated medical student. I am in a committed relationship and me and my boyfriend have a clear understanding on porn. Yes I watch it and so does he. Does that mean he's a rapist? Heavens no. Does that mean that our relationship is being torn apart? I'm very much comfortable with my sexuality and who I am where I can admit that I have no problem with porn. But of course some. People aren't as open minded as I am and I realize that and respect others opinion on not liking it. But when you start to make these crazy generalizations on how porn viewers are future rapist and all of the other nonsense that's. Where the line needs to be drawn. I mean you all fail to realize that humans literally aren't biologically made to be with one person. And this is scientific FACT. Regardless of if you like it or not, men will look at an attractive women when they pass them. No in many cases its not because he thinks less of you. Its natural. When you women stop trying so hard to supress your men and let them do what is natural you will be so much better off.

[Guest]

I'm a 24 year old educated medical student. I am in a committed relationship and me and my boyfriend have a clear understanding on porn. Yes I watch it and so does he. Does that mean he's a rapist? Heavens no. Does that mean that our relationship is being torn apart? I'm very much comfortable with my sexuality and who I am where I can admit that I have no problem with porn. But of course some. People aren't as open minded as I am and I realize that and respect others opinion on not liking it. But when you start to make these crazy generalizations on how porn viewers are future rapist and all of the other nonsense that's. Where the line needs to be drawn. I mean you all fail to realize that humans literally aren't biologically made to be with one person. And this is scientific FACT. Regardless of if you like it or not, men will look at an attractive women when they pass them. No in many cases its not because he thinks less of you. Its natural. When you women stop trying so hard to supress your men and let them do what is natural you will be so much better off.

that's absolutely unfounded & ridiculous.

"you women..."

unbelievable. porn is natural. infidelity is natural. unfaithfulness is natural.

blatant disregard for commitment is natural.

stop surpressing me. let me do what's natural, honey. i''m made to get off on porn. i'm created to cheat on you. it's unnatural for me to honor any promises i made to you.

now get off my back.

think i'll try it out tonight.

no, actually i think i'll try growing a backbone instead.

[ch1cka]

that's absolutely unfounded & ridiculous.

"you women..."

unbelievable. porn is natural. infidelity is natural. unfaithfulness is natural.

blatant disregard for commitment is natural.

stop surpressing me. let me do what's natural, honey. i''m made to get off on porn. i'm created to cheat on you. it's unnatural for me to honor any promises i made to you.

now get off my back.

think i'll try it out tonight.

no, actually i think i'll try growing a backbone instead.

Wow its amazing how you feel you know my current relationship situation. You have no clue what promises my boyfriend has made to me and whether he has kept them or not so please speak on what you know. My boyfriend isnt cheating on me just because he watches porn, maybe you need to look up cheating in the dictionary. Yes unfaithfulness is natural. Look up how long it has been around. I'm definetly not supporting unfaithful men but it happens because humans aren't biologically suited for one person. If we were there would be no cheating.... RIGHT?look it up. Do your research before you babble on nonsense. Answer this: how about those couples with healthy relationships who watch porn (like me)? Are they future rapist and evil *** people? A large majority of the time I think not. If anything the people who are cheated on are those insecure *** women who supress their men sexually because they need that constant reasurance that they are worthy. They are the ones being cheated on because their men are watching porn behind their back. If anything THEY need a backbone and some good therapy.