[cassie66]

thanks all im so pleased to have your support i appreciate it really i do
he was in an ok mood last night thank god he went to bed and fell asleep. his mother stooped a while whilst her car was fixed she just chatted in general about her car family etc and kept saying he s not eating properly i did say as i have several times in the past about his lack of hygeine help attitude and i even told her about his sex issues i took a bog risk bua all she said was regarding sex issues he needs some help and as for his other probs oh he s always been like that said he has always been stubborn and controlling even with her
she gave his £120 said its towards a debt as she is going away for a week soon
i never know what mood he will be in on an ahour to hour basis

our gas bil is due today, but i shall ring them jup and say its going to be 2 weeks late hubby just said use the savings no i wont
his mum also said i thought he d change when he married you he acts the same with me as he did at home

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Yep, she hoped that he would "change"cause she doesn't want him back...

He may very well have been controlling and stubborn with her, but she obviously let him have what ever he wants, it shows now, he's still a child..

What she is really doing is "not taking the blame" for what she clearly knows she created, honestly.

I hope you mean that she gave him that money to pay his debts, not hers and well done, that sounds like a plan, putting it off for two weeks, i think most institutions don't really mind at all as long as there is communication...

You have to still stand your ground a little more, like if he does get in a mood say pftttt, not interested, talk to the wall or something.

Seriously, cause mentally your still walking on egg shells.

We are really pleased you have grown alot I think and still can.

I say that for others cause I feel that they would say the same as me...

CW

[cassie66]

thanks

yes i shall ring gas company up, better than using my savings. i dnt pester him for sex no more no pint but sometimes even though i havnt said a word he just says no i can see what your fater in your eyes what rubbish
he also says a lot that he is good at psychology and he always knows what i am thinking how wrong he is!

i sometimes wonder if the only reason he married me because he knew ismum was selling up getting married and moving home and he said to her a lot im going to be homeless
she s said in past she dnt want him to live with her and brian so maybe he was afraid of been alone and having to do all his cleaning/cooking etc i dnt know

peaceful at mo he woint be back until 230.
im just biding my time til i have enough money, will be roughly 3 weeks until i can save agian

the savings account i have and the one which child maintence goes into are different and he knows it
i get chil benefit/maintence and some child tax credits all suppose to be for my kids its that child tax crdits he is after to pay his debts

he gets paid thurs but wnt be much so it will be another month after that until his wages pick up in the meantime i have to figurer a way out and cope how to pay each bill as it comes in so he doesnt touch my savings

well i have now changed my bank account bank is going to send details in post i hope they come quickly while he is at work orhe pay see letter he has had a habit of opening my maIL if he got to it first.
i have to be one step ahead of him now

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Can you ring the bank and ask them to send it to say your Dad's address, you don't have sisters, brothers, a close friend someone?

He is silly, he just wants you to believe that he knows what your thinking him understanding phsycology OMG, sorry.

Hun, why do YOU HAVE TO work out how to pay the bills? I know your really stuck, but your right in your thinking, he needed somewhere to go and we are right in our thinking, his Mother didn't want to have a child home any longer she wanted her own life at your expense, hense her comment " I thought he would change in marriage" she doesn't care, because she wants to live her own life now, and your stuck with him.

Well, worse scenario he will have no where to go again and he will ask her and she will be stuck, what comes around goes around.

I wish it was all in his name so you could run, run far away.

Please, he's done enough damage, his Mother may be giving him money you don't even know about and he spends it deliberately because he knows you have it.

Meanwhile your kids suffer.

Say no, you will have to find this one, I can't.. My kids needs stuff they are my blood and so far, that's all your drawing from me.

BLOOD.

CW

[cassie66]

your right of course i guess im trying to find an easy solution as i dnt like confrontation

his mom has been giving him 60 a month for the last 4 months it to go towards paying his car loan, but it goes towards my argos card i never used it but he insisted he wanted a ps3 and got other stuff to now we owe over 500 on the card he chose the stuff but its in my name! so the 60 his mum gives him goes to pay that card off as he said he would give me the psd3 money and he ahsnt so in afct he sisnt paying off the card his mum is

the rent, gas, electric water and council tax are in both our names

one thing not sure it makes much difference i havent changed my name on any of my bank accounts debit cards yet its still in my old name, mainly because im waiting for the holiday money to come back as it was booked in my old name and i thought if i changed my name i may not get the money. im still waiting for that i wont tell him when i get it as im sure he d wanmt it to pay off his bils! really,why should i pay his debt? i dnt have any im good with money
my kids are needing stuff a coat shoes etc so once bills ahve been paid i shall say the kids need it all this month for stuff etc i l have to put him off if it wasnt for these bills i could have saved the money and with him been off work so much he has lost the money that would have paid those bills

[cassie66]

i think if it came down to it his mum would take him back. she loves him.
he has a sister you know, they dnt speak or mention of her she is 11 months younger his mum and him havent seen her in over a year. she is so different in every way looks height build personality we re not allowed to talk about her
she did say to me once just after i first met him he is a spoilt kid who mum gave him everything and her nothing and he is stubborn controlling. hubby said of her she is jealous of him as she only work in pizza hut and he has an it job
i havent seen her in ages she was never interested in getting to know me and hated her mum marrying

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Mmm.. well i see two things there, not sure... If she hated her mum marrying then she hated seeing her happy.

I suspect that she gave her Mum what for, for spoiling him and ignoring, neglecting her..

Hense she dis-owned her Mum... And, told you a little, to get it off her chest.

He, can't call a kettle black, because she may have only worked in a pizza hut, but it is a job, the same as his, he can't hold a family, support, love, give or have sex, so he really can't talk about her.

Maybe you should look her up? Face-book? It's part of our site, maybe it's time you heard just that little bit more.

CW

[cassie66]

his sister never was interested in getting to know me she knows where we live never comes she blanks all the family his mum thinks she is ignoring her cos she married brian and doesnt deserve hapiness kathy thats his sister left him at 18 and got pregnant her daughter courtney never sees the family she s not alllowed too kathy never got along with her brother there like chalk and cheese its hard to believe there related she just says he s amummys boy and very childish and gotall off mum he disagrees just says shes jealous and that im not allowed to mention her name
hubby does seem to have gone through an awful lot of jobs though
he told me he has been working since he was 13 said he was a milkman and paper boy, also said he has been a tax inspector, taxi driver, driving instructor, mechanic shelf stacker etc said he has always been a grafter
since he s been working for the it company he has been off work an awful lot, 3 months with pnemonia apparanlty 2 months with tooth ache 3 weeks with an infection odd days here and there with headaches now 3 months wkith his back

he weas complaining this morning at 430am his back hurt, i thought for amoment he wasnt going

[cassie66]

i dont have a facebook account but hubby does id hate him it if i joined i ahve msn and yahoo messenger

[CHANDLERS WISH]

He would hate you? If you joined?

I know of a few here that would add you, pfttt.

Do you talk to others, friends? on MSN and Yahoo?

Maybe it's time to go on facebook and honestly say pftt and communicate with old friends again and new.

You don't have to allow him access at all...

He has to ask to be your friend.

You should give me his name haha so i can look him up, oops CW that's snooping.

Sorry Corey.

CW