[cassie66]

ok thanks
its just he can be really nasty and not realiase it.

[cassie66]

his mum has just rang me up now! she wants tyo use my driveway for simon to fix her car, that means she l come in and go on and on about hubby and his health great thats all i need well i hope simon dnt ask for his money as i dnt have any on me.

[WildChild]

You are just going to have to be more thick skinned about this. The child support money isn't yours, it's belongs to the the kids. Are you going to be able to keep him from seeing the bank information when it comes by post? Get that money moved - there should be no more and maybe less than he thinks in the account. DO NOT let the child support money go into his account.

Why make excuses? As CW says, aside from being nasty which he will be anyway, what is he going to do? He sounds like a complete idiot, stuck in childhood, an over grown child in a man's body. He demands and whines but really isn't capable of engaing on an adult level. You have to be the adult.

His car isn't your problem, he has to pay. let him deal with it. Let him be a man, insist on it. It's his car, he made the arrangements, he deals with it! Start thinking of your self and your kids as separate from him. You deal with your problems, let him deal with his.

Why do you have to pay and you have no option? Those are his words not your reality. Quit giving his words power. You know how to turn on the hot water? Do it! He doesn't use any, he is a pig (that's an insult to the animal) you and the kids need it to stay clean and to wash dishes and such. He can lump it if he doesn't like it. If he starts in about needing you to pay for whatever just say, sorry I can't. No excuses, no explainations, no arguements, you just can't.

I don't know about your food prices but if your budget is so tight how is he affording steak? Tell him you can't afford that kind of food anymore, start fixing oatmeal, eggs, pasta, reasonably healthy food that isn't very costly. If he doesn't like it he can go eat at his mums. Start asking him for money - turn the tables on him. Tell him he has to pay X, Y and Z. Act like it's just expected.

How's the job hunt going? You HAVE to find something. The child support will end and then what will you do? Are there any job services where you can get some training? Help with resume? What work have you done in the past?

[WildChild]

Why does his mum need to use your driveway? Doesn't she have one of her own? Maybe this could be an opportunity to make her a cup of tea and have a chat. Tell her how charming her son is and that she really should have warned you that he is boardering on insane? Certainly he isn't a fully functional human being!

If Simon asks for money, give him a blank look and tell him he'll have to talk to the man who owns the car - it's not yours and you know nothing about it! ITS NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!

What is your responsibity is to get to a point that you can support yourself and your kids. Or at least yourself!

[cassie66]

thanks she is using our driveway because she lives in another town now she has married and simon the mechanic lives nearer to me
she is bringing her husband brian who is 18 yrs her senior he s ok

he bought a cheap steak from the supermarket he didnt eat it

we do buy pasta eggs etc he s avery fussy eater

[cassie66]

i use 3/4 of child allowance to pay half of rent

[WildChild]

Fussy eating is for guys who can afford it.

[sallyskellington]

personally all oral sex would stop for him unless I got some in return. Why should you always be the giver but be left out in the cold. And as I said in a past post if you constantly ask him for sex or talk about it, it may make him not want to have any. You are in a tough pickle I would for now get yourself something to please yourself with and kinda give him the cold shoulder in the sex dept till he comes around...and trust me he will.

[Little]

Skelly, I think you seriously underestimate this problem. There are 36 pages of this man's inability or lack of desire to grow, change, or have sex and that's just how long cassie's been posting. Imagine how long she must have dealt with this behavior beforehand. She shouldn't have to raise another child who happens to have a matching ring on his hand.
Good for you, cassie, for standing up. We're all proud of you.

[sallyskellington]

your right little, I just read the first 20 pages in now. i give her alot of credit for putting up with so much for so long. I wish her the best of luck and just hope she is able to keep her chin up.