[Crystalblue]

Lol. After 2 kids, I'm bigger than I would've been. I'm using it anyways though. I would let my hair down, but it irritates me. It never does what I say, and with the heat & humidity, I might as well cut it all off... but I didn't like having short hair either. It curls up too much. I just can't win with it. No one appreciates what they got.

So, my husband got a better job and took me out to celebrate. I've had 2 huge margaritas & I'm quite drunk and feeling good. Lol. I couldn't figure out half of what is going on here. Looks like new posts are going on top of the old ones. Whatever, I'll figure it out tomorrow.

I had a really good day. My friend took me out to a jewelry class for the afternoon, so I got some grown up time with her, and I got to meet some great ladies. All in all, a feel good day.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Honey you are curvy in all the right places trust me.

And just scrunch that baby whilst wet

Followed by HAHA keep typing go play in the lounge , wait a minute what are you doing on a computer you had alcohol, your husband took you out, go at least and sit on the lounge and hold hands

YEP my post reply ended up 5 posts before pretzels lols

[Crystalblue]

I spent a good amount of time being silly with my husband before I started playing on here last night. Teehee. I tried to talk him in to taking me walking at the track, just for laughs, but probably would've hurt myself. Lol. I don't drink very much, so a couple drinks usually get me buzzing pretty good, and these things were huge. Lol. Almost as big as my head.

It felt really good to unwind and have some fun with him.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I just re-read that comment ,and just scunch that baby while wet?

You do know that I was talking about your hair after you get out of the shower don't you?

[Crystalblue]

Lmao! Yes, I knew what you meant. I did where my hair down for a little bit today. We took the kids to see Green Lanturn in 3d(worth it!), and it's barable for a little while, but then the humidity gets to me. Picture an out of control lion mane. Gel doesn't help, but every once in awhile I try.

[Crystalblue]

It's been alot easier to get comfortable and have fun with my husband the last few days. I've been thinking about all the struggles relationships go through and how much I've worked through in relationships.

This is a new battle for me. In most of my relationships, I'm completely giving and loyal. I'm including friendships, past boyfriends, and family. I'm not easily offended and pretty quick to forgive, but if a line has been crossed, I usually walk away from the relationship. I don't have much experience repairing relationships.

From what I've read on other threads, trust may never return completely. I may reach a point where the memory of this doesn't hurt anymore and I've forgiven him completely, but a little doubt may always remain.

Do y'all agree with that, or do you think, with work & time, trust can be rebuilt as strong, if not stronger, than it was?

[Hopeless Dork]

Crystal, hun... I was just looking at your pictures and you are beautiful girl and I am not just saying that... you are. I think by the way you dress and pull your hair back and don't use the make up etc that you are playing down your looks... do you have an idea what a hot mama you'd be in a push up bra, tight tank top, nice pair of jeans and heals... with that hair let down, unruly and wild as EVER... you think lions mane... men think, SEXY... seriously... just let it flow off of you, some lipstick and mascera and wallah... you'd be turning heads all over town. You don't NEED to change a thing about yourself , you are beautiful.

But I think you have settled into a mom, or a i just want to be COMFORTABLE role, and that is a great place to be... but its okay to flash it up when the occasion calls, or better yet... for no reason at all, to just glam it up for no good reason as a nice surprise. I think you are hot and it looks like you play it down, like the librarian that hides her hair in a bun and covers her pretty eyes in huge glasses and wears a big shawl...you've got a pretty face, long hair and a feminine body... you could be the pretty girl you are, and still occasionally ramp it up for fun into the sexy lady mode!!

[Crystalblue]

Wow, thanks so much HD. That made my day. The compliments aside, though, how'd you get so good at pegging people? Lol. I have definitely reached a place where not only am I ok with not being noticed, I'm more comfortable that way. And the pony tail is how I mix things up. Normally, my hair is in a bun. Lol

I'm working on breaking out of it though. It takes a little bit of pushing myself, but I've been doing good with the baby steps. The last couple times we went out, I put on a little bit of make up, dressed a bit girllier, and focused more on making eye contact with people. It's helping me feel like I'm breaking out of myself, & I honestly am feeling better about myself.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Wow HD in-deed, she is totally correct in that post and it's great that you saw her words as reality

It's funny Crystal, amazing strength, confidence and assertiveness comes from feeling good about yourself and I see only good things coming from "letting down your wall" as well, as you are right, every relationship has difficulties and often when we sit back? We realise that in reality? There were reasons for those problems that weren't just one sided.

But if you start walking this earth with the beauty HD, myself and others saw in that photo then you also will shine and in that, laugh again and both of you will see the kids you were no matter how old you were when you met, and it will be different, good...

Not that I am saying anything bad here sweet, but we do forget and we do go into a routine.... and life becomes "it just is" instead of yay I love my life.

[Crystalblue]

Thanks again, ladies. I needed that extra push. Lol.

My husband and I went and played basketball today! I was horrible, but I had a great time. We went back to the same court we used to play at over 4 years ago and actually ran into a couple of the guys we used to play with, so we had a nice couple games of 2 on 2.

Now I'm hanging out on the porch with my hair down, make up on, and feeling good...except for the heat, 102. I'm pretty sure my makeup is melting off my face. Lol. I'm gonna wash it off and try again before we go out for father's day dinner.