[rcoreyus]

There is a limit to how far you can support a person if they dont support themselves. Injuries and pain are bad, but people have a duty to try to live their lives anyway. If he can sit at a computer (I think you mentioned that he does this) then there are a lot of types of work he can do. Does he do all the house finances and taxes - that just takes sitting in front of a computer or papers. He should be keeping track of the finances so that you are never overdrawn.

400 pounds is a lot for glasses. I don't know prices there, but in the US a perscription set can be had for about 1/2 that. If money is no issue, then $500 is OK, but in your case money is tight and he should be getting inexpensive stuff.

He also has a duty to his children to show that you can still live your life even if something goes wrong. He should not be an example of giving up.

I'm still convinced that you do not belong in this relationship.

[cassie66]

thanks all
he had a bad night i know he hasnt slept mch as he kept disturbing me all night

he is grumpy and ratty and im getting the brunt of it. he is at doctorsthis morn, if he is to stay of workagain, he l need another note what about sleeping tablets?
ive also heard great things about tens machines to control pain has anyone tried one/ do they work?ifi can stop his pain, he may be ale to get back to work and give me space
yeshe has admitted to feeling useless and fed up and down im doing my best tohelp but he pushesme away
he is stubborn and proud and it drivesme nuts
as to if he is putting it on a bit i wish i new i jjust dnt know but i know he loveshis job
he diid ask his bosses if he could work from home they said no
he fixes laptops for aliving and bends a lot. says at mo he cannot bend. he was sayting last night his back was killing him says pain never goes just somedays worse than others
i wish i new ho long it will last as its putting a great strain on me.

[cassie66]

hs eyesight hasgot worse he has eye tests once a year because of his jon. the glasses was expensive far more than we could afford he needed bifocals and had to e specially made as very small lens hence the price. he doesnt eveen wear them although he tellsmehe does at work. he has been off work 7 weeks now and no end in sight

[cassie66]

well he went to docs who signed him off for another 4 weeks. he is fed up and depressed. dont think theres much chanceof sex anytime soon
im so stressed
money situation is bad too
i bought him a tens machinehe triedit 20 mins and sais it didnt work. i really dnt know what to do
he s making me depressed. im craving some love and support but he just sits there on pc all day whilei do alljobs says he snot up to it
im tired fed up and feel unwanted and sosexually frustrated like you wouldnt beleive

[WildChild]

Relieve your stress by using the machine - it will be good for you in many ways. You can encourage him, you can be supportive, but there is only so much you can do. Ultimately it's up to him. You need some kind of employment, it would get you out of the house and have something else to think about and bring in some income. What will you do when you've run through your money? What happens if you run through it and then he says goodbye? Whether this marriage lasts or not you need to be employed.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I agree with the comment regarding, employment Cassie.

I know you say horse training, but even washing dishes in a restaurant , or cleaning haha like you want to do more of that, I know, I know.

But, you need to do this for you and you need to NOT GIVE THE MONEY you earn to him..... 1) to get out and meet people, 2) to have support if you walk out on him, you can stand on your own two feet and 3) to relieve some stress for you.

His employer can't let him work from home because if his injury gets worse then he is liable for payments, there are rules unfortunately regarding injuries.

Start letting him fend for himself more, like make meals anything just say NO... I'm not cooking tonight your turn.

Is he still getting income of some sort?

CW

[cassie66]

yes he is gettng baisc pay and sick pay just not his bonus he s roughly losing around 600- 800 a month.

we re living on what he gets and my child support
believe meid love to get out, i am trying evrywhere to find some work
he s not eating much at the mo or sleeping.

be better when i getmy money back from the holiday from that went bust

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Oh no, another stress haha... what holiday that went bust?

I don't doubt he has pain love, hense not wanting to eat much or sleep, depressed.

But, you do deserve better you already worked that part out yourself and I kind of feel good that you have.

But the holiday?

CW

[cassie66]

we were all due to go on a family holiday last nove with travel city direct which is part of the xl group but they webt u der i put my claim in toget my money back in sept still waiting, it is atol protected so was told i l get full refund just taking its time

i do feel under stress at the moment.
its hard him been under my feet 24/7if i saysi want to go anywhere he says im coming
i just wnat some me time,to listen to music read a book go for a wlak etc alone.
he says his bac kis always killing him i presume thats why he is not sleeping
he is awake ileft him in bed.

im feeling fed up myself

[CHANDLERS WISH]

You don't have a car hey? So, he can drive? 1 Car for the family.

You just have to say, sorry, I'm going to the shops, or sorry, I'm going to lie down to read after all he's on the computer....

I get what you are saying, I am so glad that there is a refund, I hope....

Stop paying for stuff Cassie to make things happier, it's not the case and you know it and you need the money now to put away for you, just in case ok...

You are allowed to have me time, you should have me time, just say, it's me time, be back soon..... I need space.

And stand firm.

CW