Cumming Inside: It’s Carnal, Erotic and Intimate – But Should You Do It?
While the thought or act of having your partner cum inside you can be an erotic, natural, and intoxicating urge, it might not be safe – for many reasons.
Half Of A Papaya With Dripping Cream Filled Center To Signify Cumming Inside A Vagina

Things are getting steamy…

Your makeout session is at that critical juncture where you just know you’re about to have THE best sex of your life.

You’re almost intoxicated by the anticipation.

Your instincts are telling you that you probably should insist on him using a condom before things get too far, but it feels awkward to interrupt, and maybe just this once, it would be OK if things got a little too intimate and you let him cum inside you.

And as potentially disruptive to your body as the morning after pill might be, the thinking part of your brain seems to be malfunctioning to the point that you’re actually considering it as a realistic possibility if things go too far…

If you’ve been in the lovemaking business for very long, I’m sure you have encountered a scenario or two similar to this.

I know I have.

The condom or no condom conundrum is not a new one. In fact all sexually active people are faced with it at some point in their life.

Even if you’re in a long-term relationship, it is normal (and smart) to still have some doubt…after all, this is a huge decision.

For while the act of a man cumming inside you may be erotic, instinctual and natural, and can feel damn good, it might not be safe – for many reasons.

Let’s explore some of those reasons, and why you should, or shouldn’t, allow your partner to ejaculate inside you.

Editor’s Note: Some sections of this article that cover medical information or opinion on medical facts were reviewed for accuracy by Dr. Jaime Seeman – OB-GYN, who sits on our medical review board.

Article Summary:

Why is it appealing for a man to finish inside you?

  • It’s more pleasurable for both of you
  • It’s more intimate
  • It’s more spontaneous
  • It’s more instinctive, animalistic and natural
  • It’s kinky, erotic and a fetish for some

Should you let a man cum inside you?

  • Consider pregnancy risk
  • Consider STI’s and STD’s
  • Prepare for sharing fluids

Why Is It So Appealing For A Man To Cum Inside You?

African American Woman In A Bath of Milk Wih Her Back Exposed Signifying The Appeal of A Man Finishing Inside

First, it may help to understand why guys enjoy cumming inside us.

While there can be many reasons, and some reasons individual to the man, I’ll discuss just a few of the more obvious ones.

It Feels Better For Him

Let’s face it, it just simply feels better!

The reason why is a no-brainer. A bareback penis is going to feel all the sensations and be stimulated far more intensely than a penis covered by a condom. 

In fact, when I asked a trusted male friend to elaborate he said:

There is no comparison between sex with and without a condom for a guy. When I don’t have to wear a condom I can enjoy every single sensation that I’m supposed to have. A condom definitely weakens or in some cases totally removes a lot of the feeling for a guy and I’m sure it does for the woman, too.”

It Feels Better For You

But this isn’t all about the man, right? Women also like the feeling, or at least the idea, of a man cumming inside us for many of the same reasons a man does.

Like may even be an understatement for most of us. The truth is, many women love the feeling of a man ejaculating inside them.

We also enjoy the heightened sense of intimacy it brings and the satisfaction of increasing our man’s pleasure.  

One of the women on the Women’s Health Interactive forums writes:

The sexy/exciting part of the pulsing isn’t physical pleasure but the emotional excitement and connection.

On the one hand, I know that he is having an orgasm inside me and feeling such pleasure, and on the other, there’s the knowledge that I have given him this pleasure and excited him and brought him to orgasm.

I am glad to have done this for him (selflessly) and at the same time I feel empowered (selfishly).”

In fact, some women can actually feel a man ejaculating as it is happening in the moment, and certainly afterwards.

We also enjoy the freedom of an impromptu romp once in a while that can be accomplished when the mood strikes, not only when condoms are in reach.

It’s More Intimate

Could it be that part of that intense, mind-blowing orgasm your guy is aiming for is also tied to a closer, more intimate bond to you – created by that bare, skin-on-skin contact?

Absolutely!

Remember that men sometimes have more difficulty expressing themselves emotionally than us ladies.

So, the very act of being able to fully release and finish inside you at their most vulnerable moment can become a very erotic and potentially bonding experience.

If you’ve been a couple for a long time, this may be especially true.

Dr. Lindsay Gibson, a clinical psychologist and author, notes:

“Although emotional openness is increasing between the sexes, there is still an unspoken limitation on how much emotional openness is acceptable in a man. Women have societal permission to express their emotional needs, but males have been trained to be stoic. Only in the privacy of lovemaking does the man feel free to share himself at all levels with his partner.” Dr. Lindsey Gibson

You can read more on her fascinating take by clicking here.

With one of my first partners, we used condoms every single time – start to finish.

It was textbook condom usage.

Several months into our sexual relationship, we were discussing their continued use versus me using an IUD or an oral contraceptive.

He made the comment that it made no sense to him to have any barrier between us. “Isn’t that what intimacy is all about?” he would ask.

“How would you like a big hug with a wall between us?”

I love hugs, so I got the analogy, and it hit home for me.   

He said that if he can’t feel me, and he really emphasized the “me”, it seemed impersonal and routine for him.

I can relate to that!

It’s More Spontaneous

A big factor, perhaps more common among less seasoned sexual partners, is the break in continuity of love-making, or the absence of spontaneity with condom use.

It’s a potential mood-killer to be in the most passionate of moments and have to pause for a safety break.

You’re excited, breathing heavily, red-faced and ready for action when all of a sudden you have to stop and wait while your guy fumbles around to put on a condom.

He might even have to leave the room to get one.

While that is all a normal part of safe sex, I cannot deny that it can be awkward and a bit of a mood-killer.

Pro tip: Kill the awkward wait time by asking to put the condom on him yourself!

It’s More Instinctive, Animalistic And Natural

I also think there’s a very primitive urge for a man to ejaculate inside us.

Possibly rooted in his evolutionary need to reproduce, this urge may influence his strong desire to finish inside you, no matter how much his common sense may tell him that it’s not the right time, or that it could even have unintended consequences.

A former partner once told me:

The urge to finish inside of a woman is so intense that I honestly can’t even explain it. It is primal. Maybe animalistic, even. Like, I want to do it so badly that I have to constantly resist when it isn’t an option.”

Those words stuck with me because I, too, have had that urge as a woman, especially during certain times of my cycle when my libido is higher.

It is innate in us all to perpetuate the species.

Makes sense, right?

It’s Kinky, Erotic and A Fetish For Some

Finally, there’s even a subset of folks that get super turned on by the CHANCE of making someone pregnant or the chance of getting pregnant!

Yeah, that’s a real thing too…

Even if this isn’t necessarily a full-blown fetish for you or your man, the simple fact of it being taboo or “off limits” can absolutely increase its desirability, and the erotic charge you get from just thinking about it.

Bottom Line: It’s often more enjoyable for both partners for many reasons, if a man finishes inside a woman. It’s the exclamation point of lovemaking and accents the intimacy of the moment! It is acknowledging our softer, more sensitive side, and our other most basic of instincts and erotic desires.

So…Should You Let A Man Cum Inside You?

OK ladies, now that we have considered why it might be appealing to let a man finish inside you, is it a good idea?

Do we give in to our own greatest desire? Or do we delay the fluid bonding for a later time?

If you’re reading this and contemplating the question, there are many possible scenarios you may find yourself in.

Below, I’ll discuss just a few of those possibilities, and help answer your questions.

But first, we’ll kick things off with a simple flowchart – no pun intended!

Flow Chart Infographic To Help You Determine If You Should Let A Man Cum Inside You

(Click on image to enlarge)

What If I Am NOT On Birth Control?

I’ll be blunt on this point.

If you’re not on birth control and you’re not actively trying to conceive with a willing partner within a stable, healthy, long-term relationship, I do not encourage you to allow him to cum inside you, no matter how much you want to satisfy him, or yourself.  

In fact, just DON’T.

Here’s why:

About half the pregnancies in the U.S. are unplanned.  

Need I say more?

We know that pregnancy can already occur as a result of sexual intercourse, with or without any form of birth control.

If you are not ready for, or trying to have a baby, please wrap that thing up!

What If I AM On Birth Control?

Women’s oral contraceptives, the implant, the ring, IUDs and others, all have exceptional success in preventing pregnancy, with proper use.

This is made possible (mostly) through hormonal changes within our bodies elicited by these medications.

Therefore it’s very important to understand how your choice of contraception works and the potential risks involved.

So…GOOD NEWS if you’re trying to avoid pregnancy!

If used correctly, it is highly unlikely that you’ll become pregnant while using these tried and true birth control methods even if your man finishes inside you!

Therefore a condom is not necessary in conjunction with these other birth control methods, but simply increases the likelihood that pregnancy will be prevented.

HOWEVER!

You should understand that any time you have sex, you could become pregnant – regardless of whether or not you’re using every birth control method known to man.

What About STD’s, STI’s and Other Health Concerns?

In case you’ve forgotten your favorite part of junior high sex ed class, here is a reminder:

The birth control methods we talked about above DO NOT protect you from STD’s (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) and STI’s (Sexually Transmitted Infections)!

STD’s and STI’s are so vicious that even condoms don’t protect you completely from them.

So just imagine how much you increase your odds of contracting one of these god-awful infections or diseases WITHOUT the protection of a condom.

For this reason, again, you should protect yourself.

If you haven’t seen a recent negative test result from your new partner, or if you have any hint of doubt that a steady partner has been unfaithful, use a condom for protection.

Note: This works both ways!

You should provide him with a recent negative test too!

You can even perform an at-home STD test from the privacy of your own home now if you have any concerns about privacy!

Does cumming inside disrupt pH balance or vaginal health?

So, what if he’s clean as a whistle and has a recent negative STD/STI test to prove it? Time for a big sigh of relief, right?

Well, mostly. But there are still some things you need to know about no-holds-barred sexy time!

For starters, it is important to understand that when semen is introduced into the vagina, it is likely to result in changes to the pH level inside your happy and balanced environment.

These changes can cause yeast or bacterial infections – in addition to unwanted vaginal odors – or simply irritation that can be bothersome for a period of time after intercourse.

Sure, sex with a condom can cause changes as well, but even more so when fluids are exchanged. Also, if you are prone to vaginal infections condom use will decrease your chance of recurrence.

Is Letting A Man Cum Inside You Messy?

Finally, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty, and maybe the question you are most curious about.

We know it feels great during but what happens after the deed is done?

I remember a discussion with girlfriends many years ago about the first time they let a guy cum inside them. Looking around the table, I saw grimaces and grins, heard giggles and gasps.

Looking back on it, I’m not sure what we expected would happen afterwards.

Maybe the cum would dissolve inside of us.

Or maybe it would come out the next time we urinated.

Or maybe it would be like in the movies where they lay in bed and snuggle for hours after.

Oddly enough though, none of us had anticipated or planned for the residual fallout of au naturale sexual intercourse. So, what should you expect post-sex? Well, I hate to break it to you but it’s NOT like the movies.

More realistically, it will look a bit like this:

  • After some hopefully mind-blowing whoopi, you’ll do a horizontal scoot out of the side of the bed to avoid seepage on the sheets.

You’ll then swiftly tiptoe to the nearest toilet at which time you will sit there naked for several minutes until you feel confident all the cum has dripped out.

You’ll later discover your confidence was wrong as you attend an important meeting and feel some leakage working its way out at a rather awkward time.

  • Alternatively, you might just decide to lay there and either wipe up with a towel while post-coitus, or let it flow freely, and then play rock-paper-scissors with your partner to see who’s going to get to sleep in the wet spot…
Side note: Some men – and yes, even some of us ladies too – are incredibly turned on by the resultant “creampie” and afterflow of letting our partner cum inside us.

So, whether you choose to sit it out on the toilet, in the bed, or take a quick shower, prepare for some delayed leakage.

But don’t worry, you might even enjoy it!

In fact, some women report that feeling a little remnant cum seeping out later – especially in awkward moments! –reminds them of the hot sex they had and can be quite a turn on, while providing a renewed erotic charge because of its taboo nature!

If you’re concerned about the aftereffects, simply wearing a panty liner if you have to go somewhere important would do – or just taking a couple of extra trips to the bathroom to wipe away any excess will make things manageable.

Many women consider the extra trouble post-sex well worth the extra pleasure during.

Once you get the hang of it, the clean-up is really no big deal!

Bottom Line: The choice to let a man cum inside you should be weighed against the potential for pregnancy (whether you are on birth control or not) and the intimidating risks of STI’s and STD’s when you have unprotected sex. Finally, there is a bit of “fall out” post-coitus you should be prepared to handle, as it can get a little messy – but can also be a pleasant or erotic reminder of your steamy lovemaking session.

In Conclusion

Deciding whether or not to let your partner cum inside you is a deeply personal and nuanced choice that should be balanced with the possible outcomes – both negative and positive – and whether you are OK with them.

Consider your reasons for wanting to do this and be diligent with your own protection against unplanned pregnancy and/or disease.

Taking this proactive stance will greatly increase the pleasure experienced subsequently with future partners, both in sexual practice and in other areas of your life.


So what do you think? Do you have more questions? Have you ever let a man cum inside you? Would you do it? Do you like it? And how do you weigh the risks of pregnancy and STD’s vs. the pleasure of a spontaneous, passionate romp?

Lend your voice to this topic by clicking on the “Discuss” link/button that appears at the end of this article.

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From time to time, we commission writers with special skillsets and knowledge to contribute to Women's Health Interactive. These authors either wrote directly...

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